


Once More, Never Again

by StardustClearwater



Category: Undertale (Video Game)
Genre: And the sister fell too, Established Alphys/Undyne, F/F, F/M, Flashbacks, Gen, Multi, Other, Papyrus Knows More Than He Lets On, References to Undertale Genocide Route, Things Get Better, Undertale Pacifist Route, Undertale Saves and Resets, actually, and lots of angst, and magic duh, and time shenanigans, and worse, femfrisk!, frisk has a sister, lots of fluff, lots of route references, more soul colors, name pronunciation matters, neutral route references, references to violence
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-11-12
Updated: 2018-04-02
Packaged: 2019-02-01 07:25:22
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death
Chapters: 5
Words: 23,917
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12700167
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/StardustClearwater/pseuds/StardustClearwater
Summary: "Once more." You whispered as you leapt into the fray."Never again" I cried as my world fell apart.





	1. Prologue

_ I have to admit, when I got this assignment I groaned like everyone else in my class. Writing an essay on an important life moment seemed super specific and yet super vague. Where does one moment start and where does it end? Add in the change in world view caused by that moment and you have something my sister likes to call anxiety bait.  _

_ I guess I could always write about that moment when my family and I made the news, but somehow that feels like cheating. Writing about the tabloids and social media is something that hundreds of other people write about, especially since harassment campaigns and rumor mongering happen so often. Again, I point to the news. _

_ I suppose in that sense I’m lucky. _

_ Unlike most of my classmates, I really can’t say that the my life was changed via a series of small moments over a long period of time.  _

_ Rather, my whole view of the world changed all at once when I went up Mt. Ebott. Like when you tie dye a bunch of shirts all at once and wash them before they dry. The colors bleed, they run, they mix, and do all sorts of weird stuff. _

_ My world was like that up in Mt. Ebott.  It changed tons and tons of times.  _

_ I got in trouble. I got out.  _

_ I’ve lost hope and then found it again. _

_ Things were broken and then fixed, and then broken again. _

_ And I’m not just saying this because I’m retrocognitive, although that does play a part. _

_ I won’t say anything of made me go up there. That would take too long and it’s none of your business. _

_ But the moment I fell, my life as I knew it was over. _


	2. Chapter 1

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “FRISK”  
> LV: 1  
> HP 20/20  
> AT 0 (7) EXP: 0  
> DF 0 (10) NEXT: 10  
> WEAPON: STICK- ITS BARK IS WORSE THAN ITS BITE  
> ARMOR: BANDAGE- IT’S ALREADY BEEN USED SEVERAL TIMES.  
> GOLD: 0
> 
> “CHARA”  
> LV: 3  
> HP 45/60  
> AT 6 (3) EXP: 45  
> DF 0 (10) NEXT: 10  
> WEAPON: YOYO- AN ALL PURPOSE APPARATUS USED FOR ANYTHING AND EVERYTHING.  
> ARMOR: BUNNYPACK- ITS HEART IS ALMOST OR AS OLD AS YOU ARE. ALL DAMAGE IS TAKEN OVER TIME.  
> STATUS: BLEED(MILD)- HP DRAINS EVERY FEW STEPS.  
> GOLD: 0

_Charlotte Rachel Addison was born to Mary Lynn and Chase Addison on May 14th under the constellation Destroyer just as the stars making it came together. She had a head full of wild brown hair which would slowly straighten itself out as she grew.  If one was magical one would have taken the pink cast of her eyes as a sign of what was to come. Children born under constellations were special after all._

_Mary Lynn, however was not such a person and neither was Chase. They were ordinary if isolated people, whose only genuine exposure to magic was the services they bought._

_After all, it wasn’t particularly unusual to see people using their powers to find people, avert disaster, or doing community service. Even the groceries they bought were grown by the farmer born under the star of Keeper_ _._

_Sadly, the magic causing phenomenon was not very well understood. The general consensus was that star position had something to do with it but no one could agree on anything else. There were so many crackpot theories that nobody but the deeply religious cared one way or the other._

_And so they were blissfully unaware of their daughter’s true nature, for good or for ill, until her fourth birthday._

_“Mama! Mama! Look what I can do.” Shouted the girl as she bounced on her bed._

_“Oh my...” Gasped her mother. As she stared into the bedroom._

_Charlie Rae, as she was called by her parents and neighbors, had somehow made all her pillows bounce in rhythm with her bed jumping._

_“Well, that certainly is something Charlie Rae.” Hummed Mary Lynn. She smiled at the sight. “I suppose the conversation over dinner tonight will be very interesting. In the meantime, could you please stop jumping on the bed?”_

_“Awwwww. But it’s fun.” Pouted the girl as she bounced off the bed. The pillows flopped to the ground as she does so. “When’s Daddy coming home? Is he home yet? Can I tell him?”_

_“Now now. Be patient.  Making funny faces isn’t going to make him come home faster.”_

_Charlie Rae replied by sticking out her tongue._

_“Lovely lizard impression there child.” Snickered the brunet. “Come along. Why don’t you help me make dinner?”_

_Charlie Rae screwed up her face in contemplation for a few moments. “Can I make sabetti? Do we get dessert? Can we sew after?”_

_“You can stir the spaghetti and eat mango for dessert. But let’s postpone the sewing session until after your father gets home hm?”_

_“YAY.” Shouted the girl as she leapt into the air… Along with the vase._

_CRASH!_

_Oh dear, there went the vase._

_“Charlie Rae...” Frowned Chase._

_“Um… Azwiyl did it?” Offered her daughter._

_“Now now. Don’t go blaming your stuffed rabbit for something you did.” Chided her father. “Go and help your mother clean up the mess.”_

_Well, at least it was the ugly one._

~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~

In the early hours of dawn two children make their way up Mt. Ebott. Well, I’m a teenager but that’s not really the point.

Following us is a large group of men in dark clothing and armed with something. I’m mostly certain that it’s sex traffickers, or the mafia with guns. Or maybe Mafia sex traffickers with firecrackers. Either way, they are bad news. Fortunately we do have a few hundred meters on them and the shadows of the forest hide us pretty well.

It’s hard to say just how much we’ve been running with how long our lungs have been burning. I could taste blood creeping up my throat and my legs have long past the stage of soreness and were now feeling like something akin to rubber latex. Everything else seemed to sway against a nonexistent breeze.

Not the most pleasant of sensations I have to say.

I’m used to this sort of thing. I’ve spent my childhood delivering newspapers and running everywhere because I couldn’t afford a bike. Oh, and chasing after other people who’ve gotten on the wrong side of the mafia.

Of course a bike probably wasn’t going to be much help right now up in the mountains aside from being a distraction.

A distraction would be very much appreciated actually. My little sister isn’t used to running like I am and she currently looks like crap. I told her to think if it like we were in an action spy movie.

**Bang!**

Startled, I lost my rhythm and stumble over a tree root.

“Chara!” My sister stops wide eyed. “Chara?”

“GO! I’ll be fine. The first checkpoint is coming up.” I shout as I struggled to get my legs under me. Rubber latex, you are not helping me right now. “Trust me. This isn’t my first time handling this.”

I could feel her eyes on me in the darkness, even if I couldn’t see her face. For a few moments I was worried that she might stay with some futile hope that she could help. If she did then it would spell disaster for both of us. This way as least one of us had a chance at surviving.

**BANG!**

“... Kay.”  She whispered.

I stayed silent for a few second longer, listening to the sound of her foot steps fading away before my legs gave out on me.

Ah. Crap. That’s going to hurt like hell later.

But, for now-

BANG!

_No no nonoNO_ **_NONONO-_ **

Please tell me that didn’t-

“YOU BASTARDS!” I scream as I rip a tree from the earth with a twitch of my fingers. “ HOW DARE YOU SHOOT AT MY SISTER!”

Okayokay. Okay. Get ahold of yourself. This is not the time to be flipping out! This isn’t the end. It’s not over until everything ends.

It’s not. It’s not.

I take a deep breathe and fling the tree in the direction of the gunshots.

Crash!

Of course, it’s hard to tell if I actually made the mark, so I repeat the process a few more times. Complete with rocks, and dirt, and anything else I could levitate until I felt blood trickling down my nose.

I had to be sure.

By the time I was sure I was alone, the sun had risen high up into the sky.

My legs were aching from the exertion and my stomach was churning.

Not from the people I likely killed. See, as far as I’m concerned, if you are coming at me with the intent to kill I have the right to respond accordingly. Too bad I can’t take them to the bounty office for money.

No, my stomach doesn’t like it when I run, or eat or,  anything really and I sure as hell am not going to waste food by puking it up. I only have what’s in my backpack, and there’s no telling how long it will be before we can get more food.

I took another few moments to wait out the nausea before hiking up after my sister. I whistled twice. One long and one short.

_I’m alright. I’m coming._

No response. Okay. If Frisk had been climbing something it makes sense for her not to respond right away.

No news is good news right?

Right?

As I passed an odd looking tree stump I felt the hair on the back of my neck stand up.

The sharp contrast between the morning sun and the shadow somehow made the area feel more foreboding than the path I came up from. I almost felt claws dragging across my back as if the ghost of something long past was trying to dig out my innards...

I looked back at the stump to see if something was there, but I saw nothing. Then it hit me.

A barrier anchor. The check point. There was a stick broken off from the side and a tissue had been stuck onto it. Good. She made it past here at least.

Then glanced at the surroundings.

Fucking hell. If this is what it felt like, no wonder people don’t come up here.

The feeling did not dissipate when I shook myself off. If anything, it intensified.

Perhaps Mt. Ebott really was haunted. The overgrown trees looked like they had been around for centuries. Their roots had spread over everything, like mold advancing across the walls of a cheap apartment or an army of ants upon dropped food.

Goodness, I really hope my sister is alright. I whistled again, same as last time.

Shit.

ShitshitshitshitshitSHITSHITSHIT.

Still no response. Something happened up there then.

My overworked legs quickly faded from my mind in the face of the new worries over the current situation.

For a second, I debated dropping my bag.

The old raggedy bunnypack, Azwiyl was probably the last thing I had left of my mom.

It was heavy enough that it definitely slowed me down. I could probably go further if I left him. But at the same time, it has bandages and food and if something happens I’d more than likely regret not bringing him with me.

Leave it? Or Take it?

Ah… Decisions decisions.

My sister. I didn’t know where she was and she hadn’t signaled back when I whistled.

Odds are going to be pretty good that there’s something dangerous here. I think I’d rather regret bringing something than regret not having it.

Right?

Eventually, a giant hole came into my sight. I have to admit, to a moment of anxiety there. The ground around it did not look stable at all.

What if she fell?

But I know my little sis. She had a pretty good head on her shoulders she wouldn’t have gone near the hole even to lose something.

Too bad the Mountain didn’t agree with me.

The hair on the back of my neck rose again and I felt something push me forward. A gust of wind or something... _other_?

I tried to resist, to step back onto solid earth, but I couldn’t and the dirt crumbled from beneath me.

THUMP!

….

The first thing I felt was pain. It was everywhere, radiating from my body all the way to the tips of my fingers. My limbs felt like stone and responded as such when I tried to move them. I gave up after my efforts proved futile and let myself doze off.

….

The first thing I saw when I woke up sometime later, was yellow. Lots of yellow.

Yellow flowers were everywhere and sunlight shone down from above.

The pain was more manageable now.

I remembered this dream. Wait, no. Some of the details were wrong. It was normally a huge flower field with no end in sight. This one looked like it only went out a few meters.

And one of them had a face? It wore a strange mixture of shock and confusion on its face and a touch of accusation.

“.....Kara? Is that you?” It sounded like it had inhaled Helium. Which would be funny if it didn’t look at me like I skinned and ate its family. The flower was clutching my rabbit back looking back and forth at the name written on its foot.

No? Although a few people have called me that. If I wanted my name to be pronounced that way I’d have changed it myself. Yeesh. I’m not german. I grumbled to myself as I propped myself on my elbows. I was definitely dreaming. Flowers don’t talk.  “ That’s just a nickname I use to mark my stuff...”

“Oh.”

I laid back down on my side away from the flower and tried to go back to sleep.

Of course, a few moments after I closed my eyes the feeling of being watched came back.

Sure enough, when I opened my eyes for the second time the flower was watching me again. In fact, it was about five inches from my face. “Dude! Bloody hell! Stop watching me sleep!” I hissed as I jerked upright.

Oh. Ow. My hip didn’t like that idea and protested with a sharp lance of pain.

“It’s not polite to talk like that you know.” Sneered the flower. Wow, what a peculiar thing it was to see.

“Yeah. Well it’s not polite to watch other people sleep either. Now fuck off!” I flipped him the bird and flopped back down to the ground. Which proved to be a bad idea because I missed the flowers and landed on some rocks.

I hissed from the pain.

“I think someone needs a lesson in etiquette.” Snarled the flower. Thorny vines rose from the ground and shot towards me.

And then there was fire.

“You again!?” Shouted a female voice. “Have you not learned from last time?”

I heard feet scurry towards me, soft and padded, like slippers or paws.

“Oh Dear. Are you- KARA!”

What? Again?

Fuck this. I’m going back to sleep.

~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~

_You remember the first time you woke in the ruins._

_The hall was dark and quiet and you were alone._

_You used to wonder why your sister would juggle rocks every night._

_She said it was for control._

_You always thought it was silly. After all, she wouldn’t use her magic on people unless they were trying to attack them._

_But as you stared at the pile of dust on the ground, you understand why she would constantly practice._

_You understand her now._

_You hadn’t meant to kill her._

_Really. You didn’t. She was stronger than you. She wasn’t supposed to die._

_You though that if you fought long enough you could show her how strong you were and then she’d let you pass._

_That’s what big sis did when you were little,_

_Toriel was super nice and really kind to you._

_She gave you pie._

_She hugged you when you cried about being pushed into the hole. She healed your sprained ankle._

_She cried with you when you told her about your sister getting shot and how much you hope that she’s still alive up on the surface._

_It was almost like in your oldest dreams, where mama was alive. Only now the only things left were a house full of bittersweet memories. You can feel the warmth leaving the house just the the smell of pie eventually fades._

_And now she’s dead._

_The worst part was that she smiled as she turned to dust. She said she understood why you wanted to leave._

_“It was cruel of me to ask you to leave your family behind for a stranger. My apologies.”_

_Only you don’t really know what to do with a pile of Toriel dust._

_If it was regular dust you would sweep it up but that seemed like the wrong thing to do. Leaving it there seemed just as wrong._

_Eventually an idea came to mind. A long forgotten project from a class long ago._

_You decide to make a memorial. Only, you don’t really know how to go about that._

_In spite of what Toriel said when she first sat you down for a lesson, you are a stranger here. You don’t belong._

_You remember your sister burning candles for the dead but Toriel didn’t have any. You would know, you checked._

_You also remember her telling you about the releasing of the spirit and how she would sometimes leave all the doors around her open whenever someone she knew died._

_Toriel is living by herself though, if you opened all the doors and left, someone might come and steal her things._

_That would be wrong, even if she’s dead._

_You opt to make a shrine instead and leave only the front and back doors open. Everything else would get locked away in her bedroom. That way her other friends can pay respects too right?_

_But first you need to make sure the Toriel dust doesn’t get blown away or something._

_There’s too much dust to fit into a mug but the cookie jar can hold all of it. You carefully color over the cookie pattern with some crayons you find and scratch out Toriel over it. You even manage to make a small doodle that looks like the goat lady._

_Then you need to make a decision. Where does the memorial go?_

_Most memorials go over where the person died. But at the same time, the hall by the door is awfully dark and cold. It doesn’t seem to fit such a warm person._

_Maybe you can make it warmer some how?_

_It takes some finagling but… eventually you are able to empty out a bookshelf and drag it to the door where you fought. You put the cook- Toriel Dust jar in the middle shelf and some books on either side._

_She mentioned that she wanted to be a teacher._

_You quickly found yourself at a loss for what else you should do. You had only been here for one night, not long enough to really know her._

_You find yourself tempted to ask other monsters for help, but you don’t really know how to do that either. They only made animal sounds._

_Toriel didn’t have any pictures of herself. If she had you would’ve put one on the top shelf. You could try to draw her, but what if you made a mistake?_

_But then, something is better than nothing right?_

_A half hour later, you tape up a reasonably decent drawing of Toriel. At least it looked reasonable in your opinion._

_You wrote a note to her too. You put that one on the bottom shelf along with a fist full of flowers._

_Thank you. Sorry. Goodbye_

_You take another moment of silence before pushing the doors open._

_The silence was deafening._

_….._

_It’s cold outside. And wet. Which is surprising because your teacher said that Mt. Ebott was an active volcano._

_Dark too, but that’s no surprise._

_You see mushrooms glowing in the distance, giving just enough light to chase away the darkness but not enough to keep away the gloom._

_You are woefully underdressed for a place like this in your threadbare sweater, bedsheet pants, and too small tennis shoes._

_They do nothing for the chill that immediately sets into your limbs and seeps into your bones. Half melted snow quickly worked through the battered soles of your shoes. You wonder if you should be worried, but the snow is soothing the blisters in your feet._

_Up on the surface, the forest was a good thing. It had food and to an extent, shelter._

_The forest here only has snow and slush._

_It’s not very comforting._

_Especially since you can’t keep an eye out for Flowey. You don’t like him much._

_He shouldn’t have said such nasty things about Toriel. She was only doing her best._

_You told him as much, but he called you a hypocrite._

_You aren’t stupid._

_You know that killing Toriel was a bad thing. It was an accident and you can’t unkill something. No matter how much you want to._

_It doesn’t really matter though. You need to get out of here._

_Sis is waiting for you above ground._

_It doesn’t take long for the cold to sap you of your energy. Even something simple as flinching at the sound of a branch breaking became too much work. You tried your best to put on a friendly face for the skeletons though. It would be rude otherwise._

_Still, you find yourself curled up on a particularly convenient box while you tried to collect your thoughts. To warm up a little bit._

_You can’t help but wish you could turn back time, to go back and fix things._

_You close your eyes and just imagine yourself walking up to Home for the first time. You imagine that Toriel is still alive only this time, your sister is with you._

_You imagine yourself introducing them, and that you don’t feel like an old forgotten towel._

_Eventually the cold fades away from your fingers._

_You open your eyes and get up off the... steps of a cute, tidy house in the RUINS?_

_...What?_

_~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~_

You open your eyes and find yourself lying in a familiar flower patch alone.

The sky was still dark. You liked to imagine that if you tried hard enough, you could see stars.

How long has it been since this whole thing started, since you cared, since you hoped? You don’t really remember.

One more time… That’s what you told yourself. Just one.

Stay determined.

You were so tired of doing this.

You just wanted to stay lying down on these flowers.

You understand your sister now. You know the feeling of being exhausted, of having nothing left inside, the pain of going at a pace you can’t sustain.

The urge to sleep and never wake up.

And like your sister, you can’t afford to do it. The price for that would be too high for you to live with. So you pull yourself together. You dig deep. You find the last dregs of determination somewhere deep down inside you.

Once more,

You push yourself up.

You can’t keep this up anymore and it hurts to admit it. You just can’t.

You hated watching your sister run herself into an early grave. You hated how you couldn’t stop her. You hated how you couldn’t hold on to the last dregs of her memory. You hated being stuck.

But no more.

This time you will finish.

No matter what happens for good or for ill. You will see this run through to the end. You need to keep going.

You start walking.

You see Flowey again and you don’t bother paying attention to what he’s saying.

You find some amusement when he surrounds you with his ‘friendliness pellets.’ For the first time in a long time, it looks like you are the one in control.

You can’t quite stop a smile when Toriel stops him with a fireball though. Not out of any amusement or something.

It’s just, there was something really wrong with Flowey. You can’t explain it. There just was. It rubbed you the wrong way no matter how you acted around him. Even ripping him apart, petal by petal didn’t sit right with you. You just want to keep him as far away as possible.

You’re kind of relieved to see her again even if you’ve lost count how many times you’ve seen her. Her words glance off of you, like stones across the surface of a lake.

“Child. Are you well? Are you able to walk?”

You can feel concern radiating from her though. It was warm and radiant, a little like fire, but more like the smell of food waiting for you.

You let it wash over you while you nod in response.

As you and Toriel make your way to Home you come to a decision.

You don’t know if your sister will fall after you. You don’t know if she will be waiting outside. You can’t say if she live or she dies. No two runs are ever the same.

But you can make sure she is remembered and you can ask people to look out for her should she fall after you.

“I bet my sister would like this.” You start. “She loves puzzles...”

 


	3. Chapter 3

_ On July 8th Charlotte Rachel Addison found herself becoming a big sister.  _

_ At the wonderful age of six, her new baby sister Francis Katherine was treated with all the love of an octopus in an aquarium touch tank. Which to say with great fascination. _

_ The baby was poked and prodded at every opportunity, much to her chagrin, and her parents’ amusement. _

_ The second child, like the first had also been born under the constellation Destroyer.  _ __ _ However unlike the first one, this girl has been born when the star formation was drifting apart changing their effects. _

_ As a result, her eyes had an even redder cast to them than Charlie Rae’s. They were also pupiless, something that truly unnerved the Addison parents. The child wasn’t blind,something that arguably made her even more disturbing. _

_ It’s hard to decide if one ought to pity or congratulate the Addisons for their luck. _

_ Charlie Rae of course, couldn’t care less what people thought. She had a little sister and as far as she was concerned, all was right with the world. _

_ Except for her little sister’s name of course.  _

_ “Why does her name have to be Fwancis Kafferin? It sounds super old and boring.” She pouted. “What was wrong with calling her Squishy? Like her cheeks” _

_ “Several reasons actually but the biggest is that she’ll eventually stop being squishy.” Answered her mother. _

_ The elder girl nodded as she accepted this explanation. “What about Chocolate?” _

_ “If we named your sister chocolate how is anyone going to know if you are asking for candy or your sister?” _

_ “Oh.” She frowned. “How ‘Bout Coco?” Because hot coco was every little girl’s heaven. _

_ “Coco is the name of the neighbor’s dog honey.” _

_ “But Fwancis Kafferine is hard to say!” Whined Charlie Rae. _

_ “Why don’t you call her Francie Kay? Like how Daddy and I call you Charlie Rae when your name is Charlotte Rachel?” _

_ Charlie Rae thought that this was a wonderful idea. “Okay!” _

_ “Wonderful. Now be a dear and fetch your sister’s bottle.” _

_ … _

_ Alas, the elder sister found herself slightly disappointed almost a year later when Francie began to discover the joys of vocal articulation. _

_ “Aba” Crowed Francie. Waved her chubby arms up at her big sister, delighted to be the center of her attention during snack time. “Baa.” _

_ “Noooo… My name is Charlotte Rachel!” Corrected said sister as she poked the infant’s cheeks. Charlie Rae paused a few moments to consider a few facts, the most important of which was her sister’s age. “Oh. That might be too fancy for a baby like you.” _

_ “Bawaaaa.” Babbled the baby as she poked her sister back in response. “Cha.” _

_ “Charlie Rae then? Can you say that Fwancie?” _

_ “Cha?” Asked the baby. _

_ “Char- Lie Rae” Repeated the elder slowly. “It’s not that hard Fwancie.” _

_ “Chaa’a.” Burbled Francie.  _

_ “Ugh. Char. Lie.” Insisted Charlie Rae with great emphasis. _

_ “Cha’a!” Insisted Francie with an equal amount of emphasis.  _

_ The girls stared at each other for a few moments before Francie burst into giggles. _

_ “... Charlie?” Charlie Rae sighed in resignation. _

_ “Cha’a!”  _

_ “...Fine. Close enough. Since you can’t get my name straight.” Slumped the elder sister.  _

_ The baby took a break from her giggles by reaching over to her big sister and grabbing her yoyo. _

_ “HEY! Francie! Give me that!” Protested the elder as she tried to tug it back without upsetting her sister. “Yoyos are for big girls only!” _

_ Francie however, had an impressive grip for an infant, and refused to relinquish the toy. “Ya.” _

_ “You’re not a big girl. You’re a baby.” _

_ When that yielded no response Chara groaned. _

_ “Give it back or I’ll call you Frank for the rest of your life!” Demanded the girl. “That means stupid so gimme!” _

_ “Charlie Rae that is NOT what that means!” Chided their mother to no avail. _

_ “Na.” The baby kept giggling. “Na.” _

_ “But Mum-!” _

_ Francie just laughs. _

~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~

I must admit, out of the many things I worry about in my day to day life. Being fussed over by a talking goat lady was not one of them. My head is pounding a bit too much for me to really focus on the meal though which is a shame. I’m probably being an awful house guest. 

“Ka- Charlie Rae? Are you sure you are well?” Asked Toriel. She wrung her paws anxiously as she glanced back and forth from me and the food. “You aren’t eating very much.”

“Yeah. I think. I just don’t have much of an appetite. I guess.” I replied as I continued to pick at the food. Well, the more accurate term would be my stomach can’t stand large amounts of food. 

Plus I keep nodding off. Which probably isn’t convincing her that I was perfectly fine.

It probably wasn’t the goat talking to me over snail soup and butterscotch pie though, which is great. These underground snails were huge. Way more filling than the ones from the forest. Or at least they would be if I could keep it down.

Lady Toriel was the Ruins Keeper, or so she said. She was also a monster. I doubt she would have poisoned the food seeing as she was eating it herself, but only I got the milk.

The woman across from me eyed me cautiously for a few moments before sighing. “Very well. I will take your word for it. But I must insist you at least drink some of your milk. It may bring some color back to your face.”

I carefully sniffed the glass then took a sip. It smelled just like regular chocolate milk, with perhaps a touch of honey. No magic. No drugs. 

I took another sip and choked slightly when I felt it hit me. The burning pain I had become so familiar with over the last year was quickly replaced with nausea. I bit my tongue to keep from vomiting. Where was my book bag? I think I had something for this.

“Kara?”

But… it was chocolate milk… I couldn’t remember the last time I had something with chocolate in it. I downed the whole glass at once, hoping it could force the lurching of my stomach to stop.

I regretted that.

“Kara!” 

It came back up almost immediately. I felt a reassuring hand rub my back as my stomach emptied its contents. Well, that was embarrassing. At least there wasn’t any blood like last time.

“Oh Child, You needn’t force yourself if it made you sick.” Sighed Toriel. I felt her guide me away from the mess at the table and into a bedroom. “Why don’t you lie down. I will be back momentarily with some ginger tea.”

I didn’t have the energy to resist so I laid down and tried to make myself comfortable. The bed was actually too small for me to stretch myself out. I didn’t mind since I usually curled up to save space anyway. 

The last time I had bloody vomit Frisk flipped the fuck out and almost robbed a pharmacy. She stopped when I told her it was from my bloody noses.

Frisk…?! Where was she?

My spine stiffened as the events of this morning came back to me. And also my duties as an older sister. Shit. How could I have forgotten?! What kind of elder sister am I to have forgotten?

I heard something fall. Shit, my powers were acting up again weren’t they. Well fuck it. I’ve got more important things to worry about.

“My sister!” I shouted as I tumbled out of bed and out of the room. I heard something else fall behind me.

This is bad. She could be hurt. Where was she?! If only I had the ability to heal injuries.

Toriel heard the crashing sounds and came running. “Ka- Child. Please calm down. You will only make yourself worse!” 

I felt her paws grab my shoulders and push me back into the room onto the bed.

“No. No. I need to find my sister. She could’ve gotten shot!” I hissed as I struggled to free myself.

“Your… sister?” Asked Toriel.

“Yes! She has brown shoulder length hair and she’s wearing a blue sweater, worn sweatpants, some loafers and she was carrying a stick. Her name is Francie.”

“I see. A child of that description did pass by earlier though she did not tell me her name.” Toriel seems to relax at the description. Then she pushed me back down on the bed and threw some blankets over me. “In that case you definitely need to rest.”

“No I don’t. I’m fine!” I insisted and tried once more to rise. I couldn’t push past the goat lady’s paw though.

“Nonsense! You are severely ill. I cannot in good conscience let you leave in this sorry state. You are going to stay in bed and drink ginger tea and that is final!”

“My sis-” I protested one final time. 

My distress caused the bookshelf right behind the ruins keeper to topple.

Toriel caught it with a single paw and righted it without trouble.

“You sister is both strong and healthy. She is more than able to handle the monsters outside the ruins.”I stared her straight in the eyes for a few moments, wanting to fight her on that. “You, on the other hand, are ill.”

But… she’s probably right on that account.

Frisk  _ is _ my little sister after all. I taught her everything I could. If she still couldn’t handle herself, then I would have failed as a sister.

I… still don’t like it though.

“Alright. I guess.” I begrudgingly agree.

~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~

_ You remember another time when you passed through the underground. _

_ You weren’t sure how many times you had fallen by that point, only that it was one of the more unusual runs. _

_ Your sister had been the first to fall. That was the first difference. She had apparently escaped the ruins without alerting Toriel. The boss monster had been frantic and had all but locked you in your room. The battle for your freedom had also happened in the cramped confines of the bedroom.  _

_ Toriel couldn’t be spared that time either. Which was probably for the best given that she had become something of a crazy person. It wouldn’t be the last time you saw such a scene. But it was the first. _

_ You shudder when you think of those times. _

_ Often, the battle would take place in the bedroom. Unlike the corridor, the bedroom had many obstacles both of you had to fight around.  _

_ You were profusely thankful that your sister had taught you to fight in the garbage dump, how to fight in unfavorable environments, and how to improvise. _

_ You didn’t count how many shoes were thrown at Toriel and you didn’t count how many times the boss monster would trip over scattered toys. Had it been any other situation, it would have been funny. But it wasn’t. You were fighting for your life. _

_ Toriel had been much less mobile than yourself with her large size. _

_ You never got the chance to ask specifically, but you suspect that she escaped when Toriel was asleep. It’s too bad you will never know how much time had passed between Chara’s arrival and your own.  _

_ After that fiasco, you ran towards Snowdin as fast as you could. Which, given your lack of proper footwear, wasn’t actually all that fast. _

_ You passed the dogs easily enough, you’d long since realized that throwing your stick and playing fetch with them was the best way to SPARE them. Even if the other methods are much more fun. _

_ The only time when you had to stop was when you noticed the second major deviation of this particular run. _

_ The spaghetti that Papyrus left by the microwave had been eaten.  _

_ It looked like it had been hacked to pieces with a sharp rock. _

_ But the footprints near by had been familiar they led to an equally familiar figure under the tree. _

_ “CHARA!” You remembered calling. “I found you!” _

_ “Hey there sis...” She had replied as she slowly rose from where she sat. “Man am I glad to see you.” _

_ At the time you discounted the shaking and the staggering. You thought nothing of it as she had been coming home like that for a while and it always went away by morning. _

_ Oh how wrong you were to dismiss that.  _

_ When you greeted Papyrus at his face puzzle it all started going downhill. _

_ Chara started retching.  _

_ At first nothing came up. But then there was red.  _

_ It didn’t stop. _

_ “Hah. I guess the spaghetti didn’t sit well with me.” Panted Chara as she righted herself. “I’ll be fine. I just need to sit a while.” _

_ You nodded hesitantly and turn to solve the puzzle as normal, not knowing at the time about the switch in the trees. _

_ Chara sat down under the tree and dozed off, not having the energy to do much more than that. The cold, starvation, and illness would’ve taken its toll. Especially since she probably hadn’t been able to rest at HOME.  _

_ And papyrus’ terrible spaghetti probably didn’t help either. _

_ The Skull puzzle had been simple in concept, but you could never quite recall the proper way of solving it. _

_ It couldn’t have taken a long time to solve. Or perhaps it did and you didn’t notice. At anyrate, by the time you finally turned the X’s into O’s Chara had stopped moving. _

_ “HUMAN! YOUR YOUNGER SIBLING HAS SOLVED MY INCREDIBLY DIFFICULT PUZZLE! YOU SHOULD GIVE THEM A ROUND OF APPLAUSE!” _

_ No heart rate. No breathing. Nothing. _

_ “HUMAN? ARE YOU LISTENING TO ME?” _

_ You thought back to when she started vomiting blood. You thought back to the hacked away portion of the spaghetti. Then you come to a conclusion. _

_ “Your spaghetti killed my sister.” You said without turning away from Chara. You nudged them a few more times, hoping that it was just a bad joke. But it wasn’t. Her soul was right there and fading away.  _

_ “OH DEAR. PERHAPS MY SPAGHETTI WAS MUCH TOO GREAT FOR HUMAN TASTEBUDS.” Puzzled the skeleton. _

_ Then you saw red. All red.  _

_ “YOU JUST KILLED MY SISTER AND THAT ALL YOU CAN SAY?!” You knew deep down that it wasn’t Papyrus’ cooking, that Chara had been ill for a long time, but it didn’t matter. She was dead. _

_ Everything went red as you lashed out, tearing apart everything in the little clearing as everything else just stopped mattering.  _

_ Chara was dead. You killed her killer. But she was still dead and nothing mattered. Worse yet, you completely ignored what she taught you. She would’ve been so disappointed in you. Killing in rage and sadness, rather than hunger or defence.  _

_ You don’t remember much else of that particular run afterwards but the feeling of Sans glaring at your back was something that stayed with you. _

_ And so you RESET. _

_ ~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~ _

Toriel had been nice enough to give you a blanket this time to keep you warm in the ice and snow. You’ve also replaced your old shoes for some better fitting ones.

As you sit on the spaghetti table you say to yourself. “I’m just resting. That’s all”

You don’t know how long you will be sitting here and you don’t know how much of that statement is true. You really wanted to hope that Chara will catch up but you also know that sometimes, she’s stuck at the tree stump. Too strong to pass the barrier and unwilling to leave by herself.

You already made a promise to yourself to finish this, no matter what. So you already know that you won’t be spending your entire time here sitting on the table. You’ve also tossed away the deadly spaghetti to make sure that your sister wouldn’t eat it, if she passed this way.

The forest is beautiful. It looked like something straight out of a painting. Glowing crystals dotted the sky and their light gave the trees a mystical glow. 

It reminded you of the old ‘adventures’ you went on with your sister. She would make up a story about how the world was about to end and to stop it, the two of you needed to build a great machine. You fought monsters as you trekked through the ‘Darkwood Forest’ and searched high and low for ‘sacred silver’ in the ‘Sea of Days Long Past.’

Each day you would ask if the machine was finished and each day she would answer ‘we’re getting closer.’

It was really just scavenging for food and supplies at the park and dumpster, but it felt like a quest. 

The two of you even started building a giant dragon once, you called him Halvor, to be the machine that stopped the end of the world. It was just a giant hollow statue made from wire, sheeting, some steel rods and car parts from the scrap heap but it was amazing and during the summer months, it was your home.

It was never finished though. Neither of you could bear to cover the hole in its belly. 

If you finished it, then the story would be over and the two of you would’ve been normal street rats again. Homeless and forgotten.

It was something you had taken for granted in your previous runs. The beauty and magic of being kids in the woods.

You told Snowdrake all about it since he was kind of like a dragon and he was a teenager like your sister. You told him that when he went back up to the surface, you would show it to him.

Both of you had dead moms. But he has his dad and you had your sister. 

It was weird to think about, that his mom died by falling down and that yours died from illness. 

Chara never told you how mama died. Only that she died from something that was too expensive to treat. 

And now she’s sick too...

Snowdrake had promised to look out for her if she passed by. “It’d be really  _ Ice _ to meet her. She sounds like a really cool person.”

Argh… You sincerely hope that when he met your sister, she would teach him to use something other than terrible puns for the basis of jokes. Puns are great, but they do get kind of old after a while.

Doggo too. He was much grumpier about it though. You suspect it’s because he was short on dog treats but you weren’t old enough to buy him new ones. Somehow… 

Monsters were weird.

At some point sitting and waiting at the spaghetti table became more exhausting than restful and so you rose one more and continued on your way.

Ahead lies the refuge that is Snowdin and the skeleton brothers, the Dogi, and the Greater dog stand in your way.

No matter what happens, you _ will _ finish this run.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Final Stats
> 
> “FRISK”  
> LV: 1  
> HP 20/20  
> AT 0 (7) EXP: 0  
> DF 0 (10) NEXT: 10  
> WEAPON: STICK- ITS BARK IS WORSE THAN ITS BITE  
> ARMOR: BANDAGE- IT’S ALREADY BEEN USED SEVERAL TIMES.  
> GOLD: 0
> 
> “CHARA”  
> LV: 3  
> HP 50/60  
> AT 6 (3) EXP: 45  
> DF 0 (10) NEXT: 10  
> WEAPON: YOYO- AN ALL PURPOSE APPARATUS USED FOR ANYTHING AND ANYWHERE.  
> ARMOR: BUNNYPACK- ITS HEART IS ALMOST OR AS OLD AS YOU ARE. ALL DAMAGE IS TAKEN OVER TIME.  
> STATUS: BLEED(MILD)- HP DRAINS EVERY FEW STEPS.  
> GOLD: 0


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> For those who haven't figured it out. The format is Past, Chara pov, Fail run, Frisk pov.

_Mary Lou Addison was a very proud mother. Charlie Rae was growing into such a capable young lady. Yet she couldn’t help but feel a bit melancholy at what she saw before her._

_Her eldest daughter had been busy for the last half an hour mopping the floor._

_Chara’s seventh birthday passed without much mention. Most children that age would have pouted and whined about not having such a celebration. Of course, most children did not have to manage a household all by themselves either._

_Mary Lou had become ill and Chase was rarely home._

_Someone still had to do the cleaning and it certainly couldn’t be Francie. She was only a year old and was more likely to collect dust bunnies than clean them out._

_Each day Chara got up at the crack of dawn to make breakfast for her parents and feed her little sister. Given that she was already used to getting up in the morning to help her mother clean this wasn’t so different from what she was used to._

_Her father did comment on the overcooked eggs though._

_“Mama? Are you feeling better today?”_

_“Charlie Rae it’s just a bug.” Coughed the woman. “You don’t have to worry.”_

_“But you’ve been sick for a while.” Pouted the girl. “Two whole months!”_

_“Well. everyone get’s sick. Anyhoo, tell me about your day.”_

_Charlie Rae brightened almost immediately at the request. “Oh! I learned a new trick today Mama. It’s called the split the atom.”_

_“Oh? Can you show me?”_

_Her daughter then proceeded to pull out a bright green yoyo and do something amazing that she couldn’t quite follow. Of course, half way through she lost control and struck herself in the face. The piece of plastic bounced across the room “Ow! Uh… That was supposed to happen?”_

_Francie giggled in amusement and grabbed the yoyo when it rolled past her._

_“Of course darling.” Mary Lou had to chuckle at that._

_Charlotte Rachel ignored this when she noticed her sister “Frank! That’s mine!”_

_“Mine now.” Chirped Francie._

_Sometimes her youngest had the strangest look in her eyes. It was terribly unsettling, as if she was seeing straight through you. Her husband complained about it quite often, but Francie was still her daughter._

_“No. It’s mine! Give it back!”_

_“‘Kay.” Said the baby and threw the yoyo back towards her sister._

_If only her eldest would stop calling her sister that._

_“Charlie...” She chastised._

_Her eldest looked abashed. “But Mom….”_

_“Francis is too young to really understand what she’s doing. It will be quite some time until she can.” Sighed Mary lou. “But that means until then, you can collect stories to embarrass her with.”_

_Charlie made a face and engrossed herself with her yoyo once more, carefully using her powers to prevent broken furniture._

_It was amazing what children could do these days but her daughter ought to be outside making friends, not taking care of the house. Her husband needed to work more hours than ever now for the medicine and she felt like a failure of a housewife._

_“Mama? You look sad.”_

_“Mama is just sad because she’s too tired to play with you.”_

_“Oh! I can make dinner. Will that make you happy?” Offered her eldest child, eager to make her mother feel better. With just a touch of procrastination._

_“No thank you child. Your father can cook when he gets home from the casino. He can handle dusting the shelves too. You go on and do your homework.”_

_“But homework is boring and I don’t need it anyway!” Charlie Rae wrinkled her nose in distaste. “I can ask Azwiyl to do it.”_

_“Charlie Rae. You’re the only one who can see what he does. Even if he does do your homework your teachers won’t be able to see it.”_

_“Awww….”_

~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~

I’m back in the flower meadow.

The entire field shimmers in the golden light.

Sunshine colored flowers flutter and sway as far as the eye can see.

Something is wrong.

The flowers.

They’re growing. Bigger, faster, taller than they had any right to be.

First to my knees, then my waist, and now my chest.

Soon they will grow over my head and I can’t let that happen.

But they’re growing too fast and I can’t keep pace.

All I can do is cling to the stem and hope I don’t fall.

“Somebody help me!” I cry into the silence. But it was no use.

No one is coming. I’m on my own.

I dug my fingers into the stem, my nails cutting into the veins.

Slowly but surely clawing my way up into the center of the bloom.

The view is amazing but the pollen, it was ALIVE.

It crawled up my arms, and down my clothes.

In my hair, my eyes, my lungs and my nose.

They dig into my skin.

Like blood in the water it spreads and billows deep inside me.

The sunshine colored flowers bloomed cheerful and bright, ripping through skin from deep inside me.

Feasting upon my spirit and my flesh.

Burrowing through my veins until naught but empty promises remain.

Bones cracked and lost in the void.

Even my eyes, slowly lost the battle as I tried in vain to tear out the roots.

One by one at first. Then ten by ten.

For each one I tore away, three grew in its place.

And they Would. Not. Stop.

Not when my fingers we slick with my own blood.

Not when I lost my vision and my breath.

Not when I felt them break through my skull.

On and on they spread.

Until the weight of the blooms became too much

And

.

.

.

I

.

.

.

.

.

F e l l

...

I jerk awake after god knows how long.

It’d been ages since I’ve had that dream. I wonder if it had something to do with falling down here. Death by flowers was never a pretty way to go even if the flowers themselves are pretty.

Now I must admit, the notion of plants growing out of my skin kept me from moving for a good while. They left holes behind when I pulled them out.

So many little holes.

I shuddered violently until I felt bile rise up my throat and resolved to stop thinking about it.

I didn’t know how much time had passed, but I hoped it hadn’t been too long.

I couldn’t bring myself to move until the sensation of wriggling tubers faded from my mind.

Itch itch itch. _ITCHITCHITCH_ **_ITCH._ **

While I was dealing with the dumbest nightmare ever, Lady Toriel had taken it upon herself to empty and repair my backpack.

My bunnypack that was once my giant stuffed rabbit that my mother remade into a bag just so I could bring him on my first day of school.

I’m not sure what to think about that. I’ve had him for a long long time and it's got some sentimental value. Not to mention all of my stuff in it. I swear, hospitality be damned if she breaks that music player I will make her regret it.The odds of me getting it were one in a thousand and if not for that raffle I never would have been able to get it.

Plus I know how to patch up my Azwiyll but electronics really were beyond me.

Being poor sucks ducks. Seriously.

“Child. I must ask you something.” She began half way into the repacking process. “Your name. According to the label on your bag it is spelled with CH. Is that not pronounced with a K?”

“Eh, it really depends on where you are from. There's apparently a german community who does that. And also a french company who uses CH like SH. And then you have the normal people who keep CH separate from everything else. ” I shrugged as I stretched and tried to figure out a way to carry my yoyos without dropping them. “Thank the stars for that too. Otherwise my name would be sound incredibly stupid. But… Yeah. Chara like Charming or Char like champagne. Personally I prefer the latter..”

“... If you say so Ka- Char.” She stared at me for a few more moments before resuming patching the holes near the bottom of my bag.

“Why do you ask?”

The goat monster wrung her hands a for a few moments. “I… knew a child once. Their name began the same way yours did. They were very insistent about how it was pronounced.”

Oh really? “What was it.”

“Chara Dreemurr.”

“Huh. Weird way to spell Kara.” I shrugged, although the name does tick something in my memory. Dreemur was probably an important name some place in history.

...Not important right now, so whatever.

Toriel is a pretty weird monster. Or rather Momster from the way she keeps acting.

I got the impression that she would have fit in very well in a kindergarten classroom. Or a daycare center.

My eating habits were fussed over, as was the state of my clothes, my hair, and my shoes.

I mean really, I’m fifteen. I can handle myself. I do not need reminders to tie my shoes or comb my hair. Fuck that shit.

Plus it’s not my fault clothes are expensive as fuck. I sincerely hope she isn’t dumb enough to think I enjoy resembling a hobo.

Plus, it was really weird to have someone else doing the fussing. I always remembered my mother doing that, even after she got sick and she looked nothing like the giant goat monster. Scarlett the Everlasting too. However she doesn’t fuss so much as she flicks me in the nose and drags me around by the collar.

Boy, what a head trip.

I could tell she wasn’t keen on me leaving at all. Lady Toriel would glance at me every few seconds. If I caught her she would walk over to me and start fussing.

Seriously lady! Cool it! I am not sick! I just overtaxed myself and that’s why I sometimes puke blood! It’s not that bad!

Also, for some bloody stupid reason, she thinks I’ve poisoned myself. Weird.

Still, she gave her word and was holding onto it so far.

I hope.

Yoyo? Check. Butterscotch pie in a container? Check. Bandages? Check. Clothes? Check. Medicine for my stomach ache?  Check. Music player? Hell yeah! Check.

“Alright. I’m off.” I grunted as I hauled my bunnypack onto my shoulders. “I’ll see you round Toriel”

“I- Very well Ka- Char. Please be careful.” The goat monster worried her hands for a few moments before waving me goodbye. “And don’t forget to eat well!”

She looked like she could really use a hug. Too bad I’m not the kind of person to give them. Too many tainted memories. Too many ambushes. Too many hands clawing from the dark.

**_Slam!_ **

Sorry. Lady Toriel. Maybe some other time.

For a while I only had my own thoughts for company as I trekked down this absurdly long hallway. I would love to say that being stuck with my own thoughts in the dark was the absolute worst but it really wasn’t. That didn’t stop it from sucking though.

Francie… I hope she’s alright. Was she injured? Sick?

Would she be frightened? Or excited at the prospect of adventure.

I should know this. But I don’t. I’m an awful big sister. I can’t let my mind go in that direction. I need to have a clear head. I need to focus. My right hand balled into a fist and smashed into my forehead.

The sound of flesh hitting bone echoed through the hall.

Seriously who the hell thought it was a good idea to put a huge ass hallway between two stone gates? How is that a convenient security feature? Also-

“Howdy! It’s me, Flowey.”

What? Again?

“How did you get here?” I asked. Because as far as I know, flowers can’t teleport. Mind you I’ve heard about some pretty weird shit from Scarlet and some of the other bikers but still, that's a bit of a stretch.

The flower merely cackled.

“Alright don’t tell me then.” Creep. Still, the distraction from the silence and was very much welcomed.

“Remember this hall Kara? We used to come up with so many ideas here.”

I slowly raised an eyebrow. “No? What the heck are you talking about?” Because I’m pretty sure I would’ve remembered colluding with a talking flower. Aside from when I fell anyway.

“Don’t you remember the plan? I remember it like it was yesterday.” His voice becoming more insistent.

“Dude. Seriously. You need to get some glasses.” Do plants have eyes? Or is he staring at me with something else. Eh. Fuck it. Not important. “Anyways I gotta get going.” I shrugged as I stepped around him.

The flower tensed. I’m pretty sure that if he had eyebrows they’d be twitching. “Where?” He demanded. “What’s so important that you’re in such a hurry? It wouldn’t happen to be the little pansy that passed by earlier would it?”

I turned and watched him with some curiosity and amusement. “I hope you didn’t actually say that. I’m pretty sure she mauls people who insult her character.”

I’m lying of course, but he doesn’t need to know that. Also that pun was awful. Like three day old fish and chips.

“The kid hadn’t accepted the lesson you taught me Kara. That it’s kill or be killed.”

“Well no shit.” I rolled my eyes. “ I dunno about you but I’m not cruel enough to eat something that’s still alive.” I replied flatly. “Also, My name isn’t Kara.”

“Oh.” The flower gaped at me for a moment. Then collected himself before reaching out with some vines. “Wait. That’s not what I meant! I-”

“Yeah. Anyways like I said. I have places to b- OH HELL NO!”

I drew my yoyo and tried to strike at the vines prying into my bag. “Leave my shit alone!”

Unfortunately I was a little too slow to stop him from pulling out the pie.

“Hey aren’t you supposed to share with your very best friend?” Sneered the flower as it devoured the delicious pie. “Besides, I can’t remember the last time I had mom’s pie.”

Wha-? Eh. Fuck it.

Not my circus. Not my monkeys. But more importantly- “Hey she gave it to me you asshole!”

The flower just sneered then stuck out his tongue at me as if to flaunt his victory.

Welp, I know a lost cause when I see one. Damn, I should’ve used my powers. That pie was fucking delicious but I did promise Toriel that I would save my energy.

“Oh fuck off dick weed!” I hissed as re-zipped my bag and left through the door.

Good bye pie. I will miss you.

_Slam!_

I stared at the snowy forest in front of me with grim silence. I could already feel water soaking into my boots and ice settle in my gut. For a moment I thought I saw a dead body in one of the trees. But then I blinked and it was gone.

The hair on my neck stood straight up.

What the hell did I just see?

A wraith? Nah, Can’t be. Plus, what kind of wraith goes around in basketball shorts and a hoodie? A nonexistent one that’s what. Also I’m fairly certain there aren’t any other humans underground aside from my sister and you can’t get a genuine wraith without a conjuring mage nearby or a large source of magic.

I hope.

For a moment I was tempted to turn and head back to the ruins. It had been so long since I’d been warm…

But my sister. Frisk. There’s only the two of us. She was my responsibility and mine alone because no one else is coming and we’re on our own.

Gotta keep going, no matter the cost.

I took one step, then another, beginning my long trek through the woods.

It didn’t take long for me to taste the familiar tang of blood.

God I’m so fucking tired.

~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~

_You remembered another run. Possibly your most entertaining one._

_It was another one of the timelines where both you and Chara had fallen together. Chara first, and then you. You remember her saying the landing hurt, but you don’t remember much else._

_Both of you were feeling kind of achy from the fall and the cold damp air of the underground did nothing to help._

_It was kind of funny, watching your sister deal with all the monsters.  She fast talked her way out of the fight with Toriel before it even got to that point by ranting about some crazy customers and snarling that she’d kill them if they kept being stupid. Apparently it contrasted Chara’s typical demeanor enough that it actually left the goat monster speechless._

_Interacting with the monsters had become something of a routine for you by that point, but not your sister._

_Which was something you had forgotten until then._

_She also somehow managed to politely ignore the skeleton brothers. Which was probably for the best given her personality. She wasn’t exactly one to suffer fools lightly._

_You still giggled when you think about it._

_Her reaction to Sans had been a little odd though. Normally she hated bad puns and if someone snuck up on her she would punch them or throw them. When Sans did that she did neither._

_Chara didn’t even bother hiding when Papyrus first showed his face. She just put the lampshade on her head and pretended to BE the lamp. She returned it before continuing on her way._

_“Frisk. Trust me on this one. You are surrounded by dangerous people, the very first thing you learn is to pick out the barkers from the biters.” Whispered Chara after she checked to see if you were alone. “That bag of bones that followed us? He can definitely throw around his weight.”_

_“What about Papyrus? He seemed strong too.” You asked._

_“Maybe. But he wouldn’t be the one inclined to attack you for saying the wrong thing. He also doesn’t seem all that bright.”_

_But you still didn’t understand._

_“Sans is a lot like… Um…  Geez.” Chara scratched her head as she grasped for the right term. “Oh! I know. He reminds me of a pepper! Sometimes it burns a little, sometimes it burns a lot and sometimes, it's a bloody chemical weapon. Does that make any sense?”_

_You could only nod in response. That wasn’t something you would use to describe Sans. But as you rolled the description in your head and processed it. You found yourself agreeing a little. Sans was kinda scary and you knew it. It didn’t really stop you from hanging out with him in other runs though._

_“The other one that looks like the grim reaper in a super hero cosplay is more like a lemon. I’m sure he’d brighten up your day with just a touch of his presence. But I don’t know anyone who is willing to eat a whole lemon all day every day.” Grimaced Chara.  “Which is why I really don’t want to see either one of them again.”_

_Oh._

_You remember being really surprised when she said that. You didn’t have many friends but your sister had always been polite to the people you hung out with. But in retrospect it kinda made sense._

_Sans was a lot like some of the people she had to work with, dangerous and cunning. She always tried to keep it from you, but you always found out._

_Papyrus… Well when you’re hurt, lemons would be the absolute last thing you want to deal with._

_You remembered that you stopped giggling once you realized that._

_And then there was Snowdrake._

_Now there was something you didn’t expect._

_“Oh. My. God. IS THAT A DRAGON?!” Gasped Chara the moment she saw the teen monster.  “That. Is. AWESOME!”_

_“I- What?” Asked Snowdrake, who looked like the world abruptly tilted 90 degrees”. Which, in all honesty makes sense because you’ve only ever seen her squeal and coo like that with top notch Yoyos, flowers, candy, and hot baths. “Um.. Ice to meet you??? I’m Snowdrake.”_

_“EEEE! IT talks!” Chara chirped as she did a small happy dance. Then with a grunt of effort, she hoisted you up and stuck you in his face. “Doesn’t it look like the one we made? The snowflake is there and everything!”_

_“Uh… Hi! I’m Frisk?” You kicked you sister until she put you down careful to avoid her stomach. You landing on it, sure it had to have hurt. “And put me down! You sound like Papyrus!”_

_“I do not!” Panted your sister dropped you like a bag of flour. “I’m nowhere near as obnoxious as the Lemon Grim Reaper.”_

_Snowdrake snorted at the comment._

_“You are too! You’re super Lemony and just as bone headed as he is!” You stamped your foot and then waved your arm in the approximate direction of Snowdrake. “You didn’t even introduce yourself to the monster before sticking me in his face!”_

_Snowdrake giggled at the pun. Well, at least someone was enjoying the view._

_Chara blinked in surprise and coughed awkwardly in acknowledgement. “Ah ha ha. Hi! I’m Charlie Rae-”_

_“She’s my sister and she’s super special and super weird!” You piped up only for Chara’s hand to cover your mouth._

_“-and my little sisters a brat. Trust me I most definitely am not a special snowdrake. I-I mean Snowflake.” Corrected the human teenager. Then she glared pointedly at you “Not. A. Word.”_

_It only took a moment for you to start cackling at her slip. “Ha! Pun!” You pointed. “You didn’t even spend that much time around them and you’ve already got the puns.”_

_“Ugh. Shut up. I’ll have you know that puns are the lowest form of humor.” Chuffed your sister._

_Lies. Lies you say. Also it’s super funny watching your sister react._

_“It’s not my fault the boneheads didn’t have the guts to stop us.” Shrugged Chara_

_“Pun intended?” Inquired the monster._

_“Wha-? Oh Come on... Not you too!” Chara groaned with false despair and pinched the bridge of her nose._

_You tell the drake that you sister just doesn’t like puns very much. You conveniently omit bombarding her with them last year on April Fool’s because it’s funnier that way._

_“That’s… That’s just because you suck at telling them...”_

_“Yeah. Your sis has a pretty COOL attitude. ”_

_“Stupid jerks being all contagious.” She grumbled as she resigned herself to drowning in puns. “All right. All right. Can the word salad will you?”_

_“‘Kay. I’ll dress up my words now. Sis.”_

_“OH GO AND BOIL YOUR SHIRT!”_

_“I hope you like TEE then.” You snickered._

_Snowdrake just howled with laughter. You hoped he could collect himself before he got winded._

_“Blaah. You’re killing me here little sis.” Chara just groans some more._

_The monster, eager to try his luck offered up. “I guess you’ve got a COLD reception? Compared to earlier?”_

_“Yeah. I guess I am kind of a cold fish.” She sighed then quirked a smile. “Careful though. Keep this up and I’ll Cornobble you.”_

_Cornobble?_

_You opened your mouth to ask but Snowdrake’s guffaws drowned you out. Oh well, you’d just ask what it meant later._

_But since he was occupied..._

_“Hey sis, Why were you so excited to meet Snowdrake?”_

_“Well, he looks a lot like an old friend.” Answered Chara losing some of her energy._

_But you didn’t pay him any mind as you turned back to Chara. “What are you talking about? We’ve never met a birdragon.”_

_“Eh. Maybe you didn’t. But never mind that.” Coughed you sister awkwardly before directing your attention back to Snowdrake. “Do you honestly not recognize him?” Chara sniffed with faux indignance and pointed in Snowdrake’s face. “L-look at him”_

_What was up with your sister? Did she suddenly-? Oh wow yeah. Now that you had a closer look at the Monster. He looked just like the dragon. “Just like Halvor.”_

_“Yeah.” Shivered Chara as she finally seemed to register the cold. Or perhaps, the snow on her clothes had melted and began to soak through to her skin. The teen slowly sank into the snow, crouching to conserve some heat. When she coughed, you saw tiny flecks of red appear at the corners of her lips. “L-looks just like him.”_

_Chara carefully wiped her mouth, careful not to get blood on her sleeve._

_Snowdrake, it seemed couldn’t hold back his curiosity anymore and butted in. “Who’s Halvor?”_

_“He’s the name of a dragon. He’s really cool.”_

_“Oh.” Chuckled the teen. “What’d he do?”_

_“He- Hm...” Chara held up a finger to answer, then paused as she realized that she didn’t know. Her arm slowly drifting back to the snow. “Good question. I don’t really know.”_

_You should probably get going soon. It’s very strange for your sister to not be energetic and Chara had a nasty habit of ignoring things that hurt her. She had been like that for as long as you could remember and sometimes, it was the scariest thing in the world._

_“It’s the norse protector of the innocent.” You chirped casting an odd look at your sister. It was a useless if interesting fact you learned from school. Now for the tricky part, do you confuse your sister, or do you confuse Snowdrake? No contest. “Anyway. We’re getting super cold. Do you know any place where we can stay and warm up?”_

_You pointed at your sister who was now sitting completely on the ground, with an arm propping her up._

_“Eh? You’re not from around here?” Snowdrake cocked his head in befuddlement. “Well, that’s fine. I can show you the way to Snowdin.”_

_You opened you mouth of thank him when he held up a wing. “Ah ah aah. Not so fast. I’ll give you a ride and pay for a meal if you guys teach me your secrets!”_

_“S-Sorry.. What?” Clattered Chara._

_“You guys are really funny.” Sighed the teen monster. “But nobody ever laughs at my jokes. So what’s you secret?”_

_You glanced down at you sister and she glanced up at you. Then you turned to Snowdrake with the only answer that came to mind. “A partner.”_

_The boy blinked. “Really? That’s it?”_

_You both nodded._

_“It’s f-fun to argue sometimes...” You start._

_“A-and if you stammer or mess up your p-partner could pick up the slack.” Finished Chara with a bit of a slur._

_And then Snowdrake carried you both to Snowdin on his back._

_Chara had been a mixture of amazed at the idea of a town covered in snow underground and irritated that neither of you had anything to shelter you from the cold. Your sister had it a bit worse since all of her clothes were cotton whereas your jumper had been wool._

_At any rate, the two of you stumbled into town and the very first thing the two of you did was fill up on food. Grillby’s was probably the best restaurant you’ve been in except for maybe the one your sister worked in. With Snowdrake and some of his friends paying neither of you hesitated to indulge._

_You happily stuffed your face with burgers while you sister picked away at a salad and covertly shoved fries into her bag._

_“The puns made me sick.” She joked. Then she shook her head “Kidding. Kidding. But I’m honestly not all that hungry.”_

_“Well...” You hesitated. “Eat it anyway. The food is good.”_

_Chara stuck her tongue back out at you but she ate anyway, thanking Grillby after she finished. Each swallow gave way to a wince she tried to hide and you pretended not to see. It hurt her when ever you noticed and it hurt you when she got sick._

_There was never enough money and medicine was too well guarded for either one of you to steal._

_So both of you agree to keep the charade up._

_Your stomach churns at the idea though and you lose your appetite. You set what’s left of your burger on the table and thank Grillby._

_You sister raised an eyebrow. “Did you bite something gross?”_

_You shook your head. “Ate too fast.”_

_Chara nodded in sympathy before putting her head down on the table. “I saw a hotel here. Ya think I can trade in the apples for a night of rest? I think both of us could use some sleep.”_

_You nodded with vigorous enthusiasm. Your sister was awesome and surprisingly charismatic when she wanted to be. Of course she’d be able to do it. Your sister could do almost anything._

_Almost._

_Chara shakes her head in fond exasperation. “Oh my god. No need to be so excited.” But she drags herself off the table with her knapsack of food and makes for the exit. She staggers but turns at the door. “Finish up your burger and meet me there.”_

_You turned back to what’s left of your meal and wrap the leftovers in some napkins before shoving it in your pocket and running for the door. Hey, you were going to finish your meal, just not at that moment._

_By the time you found your sister, you were shivering. Water from the snow had melted and soaked into your shoes leaving your toes feeling worryingly numb. The rabbit woman at the counter was glancing between them with looks of concern and apprehension. Her son on the other hand was happily munching on a green apple you had brought with you on your adventure. Your sister had been dry heaving into a garbage can. Given the nature of monster food, nothing hit the bottom but that didn’t stop her stomach from voicing its displeasure._

_“Go on right up stairs.” Said the rabbit. “You two can rest as long as you like.”_

_“Thank you.” Said Chara and slowly trudged up the stairs._

_You followed shortly afterward._

_You suspected that this particular arrangement had less to do with your sister’s bartering skills and more with the fact that you both looked extremely unwell. But you weren’t about to say anything._

_The bed._

_Oh gods the bed. It was so soft the two of you just flopped down on top of the comforter._

_“I feel like I could sleep for the first time in forever. And not wake up.” Mumbled your sister._

_You made a vague noise of agreement as you felt yourself dozing off._

_Even with your eyes closed, you could feel warmth seep into your bones. The combination of food in your stomach and your sister in bed with you filled you with contentment._

_Things were going really well for once. It actually seemed like both of you would make it out alive this run. Especially your sister, who had always died in some way or another._

_You woke up later with more energy than you’ve felt in ages._

_But Charlie Rae, your sister._

_She…_

_Never did._

_~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~_

The sight of Snowdin used to warm your spirit.

When you closed your eyes, you once thought you could hear music echoing through the town. It was a happy song, light and bouncy like puppies in the grass.

But you’ve since accepted that it was either the result of a childish imagination or your own magic mixing with monster magic. Either way, it wasn’t something you enjoyed thinking about. You’ve stopped counting how many times you’ve trekked through the underground because it gave you a headache every time you tried.

You didn’t have enough money to rent a room at the Inn and while you're sure the receptionist would let you stay anyway, the memories of your sister dying in those beds had ruined the inn for you.

And while you found comfort in being surrounded by books, the materials on the shelves left you feeling a bit peculiar. Perhaps it was fate, but all the books you pulled off the shelves took you to some rather dark places.

You completely and utterly fail to see why monster schools would make their students write about funerals. You were once told to do the same thing, but that was mostly to compare different cultures. You failed that assignment though, you had no parents to ask and Chara just wasn’t around on account of working to take care of a useless sack of meat like you.

You ignored the history books. The subject was boring and you saw enough of it in your day to day life. Heck. The whole ‘Eyes of the Historian’ ability is the reason you never had any friends. People tend to get kind of skeezed out when they notice the lack of pupils in your eyes.

The philosophy and anatomy books though, were a treat.

You shuddered at the amount of destruction magic bullet cards probably caused. You went to a school for mages so you had a pretty good idea of what free floating magic could do. Most of the times it ended with something broken and someone being sent home early because they got hurt real bad. Sometimes you were lucky to be a seer and sometimes you got sent home.

The thing about what souls were made of... That _couldn’t_ be right. Souls weren’t made of anything other than willpower and passion. The desire to live and move forward trumps everything else and without it, you can’t do anything. You just get depressed and die.

Everything else is secondary.

Your sister said so.

Your sister could be wrong about a lot of things, but you don’t think she was wrong about this. After all, Chara was the one who supported the two of you when times got hard. With only her own powers no less. Sometimes she got into some serious life or death situations which she tried to keep from you, but failed on account of you being a kind of seer.

Maybe it was different for monsters. You sure hoped so. It would be so much easier if souls were full of love and compassion but… your scars.

Yours and Chara’s spoke otherwise.

So you choose to rest by the dimensional box outside the Snowed Inn. It’s a perfectly sized seat for someone your age and the pack rat in you is very tempted to take it. Something like this could sell for a decent amount of money. You might even be able to sneak a monster or two out past the barrier.

But you can’t afford to wait forever. You need to continue.

One step in front of the other, slowly you make your way out of Snowdin.

Eventually a familiar fog settles in and a boney silhouette appears.

“HUMAN.”

And so it begins.

“LET ME TELL YOU ABOUT SOME COMPLEX FEELINGS.”

Again.

“THE JOY OF FINDING ANOTHER PASTA LO-”

_CRASH!_

The sound of something being torn asunder echoes through the area. You could even see a faint trace of familiar dark pink-but-not-quite-red energy radiating up from the forest.

That wasn’t something that happened on any of your previous trips down here. That means…

“CHARA” You shout.

You instantly abandon your battle with Papyrus and make your way to the commotion. “HUMAN WHERE ARE YOU GOING!” He cried from somewhere behind you. You didn’t answer.

If you had learned _ANYTHING_ from your previous runs with Charlie Rae it was that her poor constitution can and would kill her in short order. You had food in your inventory so she could heal. But that didn’t matter if she died before you got there.

You don’t know how long it took, but you heard Chara just before Papyrus’ puzzle tech fail. You followed her stream of curses until you found her just off the path all tangled up in green spiky vines. Fallen trees thrown askew.

Fuschia colored magic flooded the area causing various leaves and other plant matter to twitch erratically.

Oh no. Not good. She normally had better control than that.

“COME BACK HERE YOU TEA BRAIN BASTARD.” Screams an achingly familiar voice. Chara was a sight for sore eyes as she dangled from an uprooted pine. Her many layers of clothing protecting her torso from the thorns and unfortunately, the blood trailing from her eyes and nose all painted the image of her only living family. “FIRST YOU SPIKE ME WITH THOSE GODDAMN THORNS. THEN YOU STEAL ALL MY FUCKING FOOD. NOW YOU'RE HANGING ME LIKE SOME STUPID PAIR OF BOXERS! WHAT THE HELL DID I EVER DO TO YOU? YOU PIECE OF SHIT MONKEY’S- Oh hi Francie.” Said your sister as she abruptly switched from rage to forced cheeriness. Her head turns in your direction, but her eyes never seem to focus. “Mind getting me down? I…….. I think I hit my head or somethin'. Nothing’s makin’ sense.”

You couldn’t help it. The incredibly bizarre scene just rings of your sister’s shenanigans. So much so that laughter, of relief and joy and a touch of hysteria, bubbles up from within you.

“Feelin’ the love here little sis.... I’m really feelin’ it.” Drawls Chara in a parody of some of the country songs she sang. “But seriously Francie. I’m starting to get nauseous swinging this high up.”

As silly as is sounded, the sight of her being suspended from the branches of a tree filled you with relief. Chara was ALIVE and right now, that was the best thing you’ve had in a long, long time.

You take a moment to collect yourself because even if this is funny, your sister still has a limited amount of time before her body gives out.

The problem now is that you don’t have anything to cut the vines with. The toy knife isn’t very sharp and the only other knife was the one in Chara’s bag and that one was way out of your reach.

You needed help and fast.

You tell your sister that you’ll be right back with something to cut her down.

“Take your time. But not too much.” She slurrs. “I’ll just be here… hangin’ out.”

You fought to keep from giggling even as you started searching for help. What was wrong with you?!

You debated calling for Sans. He could teleport and everything. But you remembered something he told you in another run.

_“Y O U’ D  B E  D E A D  W H E R E  Y O U  S T A N D.”_

He had played it off as a joke, but you deserved it all the same.

You were mostly certain that he wouldn’t hurt you. After all, you hadn’t killed anyone this time, not that that’s a major accomplishment or anything. Given how many times you had passed through the underground, you had to have gotten pretty good at SPARING monsters.

Your sister on the other hand… She was dangerous.

Not just because she had LOVE or EXP or anything, which she did. It kind of came with dealing with the underworld. The human one anyway.

No, Chara was dangerous in the exact same way Sans was.

The notion of the two of them meeting fills you with dread and you shake away the thought.

No. Sans wouldn’t be much help right now and it wouldn’t do to think on that.

“Yo. Ice to see you again.“

Oh thank god. Maybe this run will actually work out. Snowdrake had cutting attacks right? You really hoped he did.

You did NOT want to think of the alternative.

“Snowdrake! I found my sister. ” You call. “She’s caught up in something and she’s kind of freaking out. Can you help us?”

“Oh s’now Problem at all. I’ll be happy to Alp you.”

As awful as it sounds, you were glad to see your sister rambling to herself when you got back to the tree with snowdrake. It meant she was still alive and kicking. Even if she was just repeating ‘GET ME DOWN’ over and over again through gritted teeth. Her brown hair having turned pink from Chara’s magic bleeding into it from the struggle.

“Uh-... I don’t _snow_ much about humans.” Began Snowdrake. “But is that normal?”

You shook your head. No. No it wasn’t.

Suddenly, Chara stopped her squirming and slowly turned towards your voices. Bright red trailed from her nose and the corners of her eyes giving her the appearance of some demented clown from a horror show. She cheeps “Oh. A dragon and sis. Hi you.”

And she stops.

  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Final Stats:
> 
>  
> 
> “FRISK”  
> LV: 1  
> HP 20/20  
> AT 0 (7) EXP: 0  
> DF 0 (10) NEXT: 10  
> WEAPON: STICK- ITS BARK IS WORSE THAT ITS BITE  
> ARMOR: BANDAGE- IT’S ALREADY BEEN USED SEVERAL TIMES.  
> GOLD: 0
> 
> “CHARA”  
> LV: 3  
> HP 45/60  
> AT 6 (3) EXP: 45  
> DF 0 (10) NEXT: 10  
> WEAPON: YOYO- AN ALL PURPOSE APPARATUS USED FOR ANYTHING AND EVERYTHING.  
> ARMOR: BUNNYPACK- ITS HEART IS ALMOST OR AS OLD AS YOU ARE. ALL DAMAGE IS TAKEN OVER TIME.  
> STATUS: BLEED(MILD)- HP DRAINS EVERY FEW STEPS.  
> GOLD: 0


	5. Chapter 5

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> I had this written a while ago, but i kept changing my mind on where the story went. Chapter 5 is 25 percent done.

 

_Mary Lou Addison, after more than a year's worth of fighting, finally lost the battle against the disease which had all but rotted her out from the inside._

_“Take care of your sister won’t you?” Asked Mary Lou in her dying moments alone with her eldest daughter. “And yourself? I want both of you to be good people. Strong people. Will you promise me?”_

_“I promise Mama.” Whispered Charlie Rae without picking up her head from her mother’s lap. Her sister and father came in a few moments afterwards so that they could spend Mary Lou’s final moments as a family._

_So for Charlie Rae’s 8th birthday, she had a funeral._

_Her Mother’s to be exact._

_For birthday presents, she received condolences and looks of pity from people she had never met, head pats from strangers, paperwork from her father who disappeared three days ago, a week in the rain guarding the grave as traditions dictates, and duties over her sister and herself from her mother’s will._

_To herself she gave the gift of silence. Not a single question was asked, and not a single question was answered._

_It was the only thing she could give to herself._

_No matter how many times they peppered their father, the doctors, or the neighbors, no answers were forthcoming._

_Neither one of the Addison children truly understood why it happened and nobody wanted to tell them. Nobody could._

_The funeral itself was a somber affair. People came, People left, and words were spoken._

_Everything._

_“Those poor children.” “That poor man. Losing his wife after all of this.” “I say he was a terrible husband! What sort of man leaves his children alone to work in a casino of all places!” “Why didn’t he show up with the children?”_

_Just noise._

_Charlie Rae didn’t speak even after she got home._

_“Chara?” Asked Francie. “What now?”_

_Charlie Rae Shrugged. ‘I don’t know’_

_“Oh ok.” Nodded the toddler. “Can I get mac and cheese?”_

_Charlie Rae thought for a few moments then shrugged in confirmation. She rose from her spot in the closet and started going to the kitchen. She stopped just as she was about to turn down the hall when she looked back at her sister._

_Francie jerked away from her coloring book when her sister clapped her hands. “Sis?”_

_Chara made a stirring motion with her hands, then jabbed her thumb towards the kitchen. ‘Want to make it with me?’_

_Francie cocked her head uncomprehendingly but went with her to the kitchen anyways._

_Making Macaroni and cheese together would’ve been more fun if it were last month. Charlie Rae smiled a little though, which was good. Her little sister had missed seeing it. Maybe things could go back to being like the way they were._

_Except it didn’t. Wouldn’t_

_When Chase Addison finally appeared in the household a week after the funeral, the first thing his did was hug his eldest daughter. “Daddy is so sorry he missed the funeral.” He said with his breath stinking of wine. “Daddy just needed to get a few things straightened out..” He said._

_Charlie Rae, still clinging to her gift of silence, only nodded._

_Chase then told her that things needed to change._

_With Mary Lou dead, there was no one to take care of Francie while Charlie Rae went to school and Chase went to work._

_And there was no money for a daycare._

_Charlie Rae only nodded once more before returning to her homework with determined eyes._

_The very next day, she went out and got a job delivering papers. She was to arrive at the office everyday at 7am sharp to receive and deliver her load. She had an hour and a half to deliver one hundred and fifteen papers before she had to go to school herself._

_No babysitters were found so Charlie Rae often took her sister to school with her._

_This was ordinarily not allowed, but the younger Addison was a quiet and agreeable child, much like her older sister so the teachers were willing to look the other way. Francie typically spent most of the day coloring._

_Eventually, this became the new normal, and for a while there was peace._

_One day, Francie stopped wanting to feed the class goldfish. Nobody minded since she had yet to turn three._

_A week after that, she stopped going to the tank. ‘Understandable,’ the teachers thought. The toddler was probably bored. They gave her some blocks_

_A month later, she began crying at the sight of it. ‘The fish movie was scary. Sharks are scary’  thought Charlie Rae. “She’ll get over it.” The teachers, however began to look concerned._

_But she didn’t._

_One semester later and Charlie Rae found herself in a conference with her teachers. School had long since ended and both of her teachers have crammed themselves into the classroom. Charlie Rae didn’t know what was going on._

_“Charlotte Rachel Addison.” Began a blonde._

_“Yes Ms. Wolf?” She glanced at the other teacher in the room and greeted her accordingly. “Ms. Morris.”_

_“Do you know why you are here?” Asked Ms. Wolf._

_She had her suspicions, given that she was the only child in the room. Francie had been taken home earlier by her classmate while she stayed behind._

_“U-Um. Francie’s just going through a phase.” Began Charlie Rae, franticly stumbling over explanations for the sudden change in behavior of her little sister. “She’ll be over it soon. It was just the movie I swear. I’ll talk to her when I get home. Uh.. S-so please don’t kick her out. Mama died a while back and-”_

_“Stop.” Her history teacher held up a hand. Ms. Wolf taught multiple subjects normally, but only history and english for the elementary students. “Nobody is in trouble.”_

_“-There’s no one who ca- Eh?” Jolted Charlie Rae. “Um. What do you mean?”_

_“We had hoped to speak with your father on this subject, as it pertains to your sister’s future education.” Sighed her math teacher, Ms. Morris. The brunette ran her fingers through her hair as if gathering his thoughts. “We believe she needs an evaluation.”_

_Charlie Rae puffed up like an angry rooster. “Francie is NOT crazy, retarded or autistic!”_

_“No no. None of that.” Sputtered the math teacher while the other one guffawed. “No. We meant magically evaluated. Her birthday is June 8th right? That’s the under the Destroyer, as its falling mind you but still under the destroyer.”_

_“Um… Okay?” The girl cocked her head as she eyed them suspiciously. “But she hasn’t done anything weird yet.”_

_“That’s true. But she_ is _showing signs of the curse. If that’s the case then you will need to find a workaround for that.” Said the history teacher._

_“What curse?” Demanded Charlie Rae as she jumped out of her seat. “Who cursed her and how do you get rid of it!”_

_“Calm down. There’s no need to panic.” Soothed Ms. Morris. “I’m talking about the Mage’s curse._

_”Oh.” Replied the child. She slowly sat back down with a pensive look on her face._

_Nobody knows when it first began, but it has been known for quite some time that each mage has something that acts as a direct shut off for their powers. Finding the willpower to overcome it is considered a major accomplishment that few ever manage in their lives._

_More often than not it manifests as a phobia of some sort. A mental allergy._

_The story commonly used to explain its origins is that the First Mage offended a god with either excessive cruelty, warmongering, or arrogance and was cursed with an intense and irrational fear of clouds as punishment. Naturally this put a damper on any barbaric inclinations for the rest of his life._

_Many an unfortunate warlock like the First Mage has been stopped by mundane objects like rain, or eggs or styrofoam peanuts._

_“But wouldn’t she be a kinetic like me?”_

_“You kinetics are an active class of mage. You’re sister, if she does have the Mage’s Curse, is likely to be passive.” Explained Ms. Morris. “A seer like me, in fact.” She added gesturing to her pupil less eyes._

_The girl nodded as she slowly parced the information.“W-what are you going to do then?” Asked Charlie Rae. “The testing I mean. What’s going to happen afterward?”_

_“Mmmm. Given that your father isn’t here to fill out the paperwork, your sister is probably going to have trouble accessing the necessary schooling.”_

_“I can fill it out.” Replied the girl, a little too quickly in fact. Her fingers twitched, as if making to grasp something and aborting the notion._

_The two teachers shared a glance. Ms. Wolf leaned forward gently. “Honey, the papers need your father’s signature.”_

_“I figured.” The 9 year old slowly blinked. “He’ll be home soon anyway. I’ll make him sign it then.”_

_Ms. Morris raised an eyebrow. “If you say so. But remember that forgery is illegal and the consequences will not be pretty.”_

_“I dunno what you’re talking about. Nobody forges anything.” Charlie Rae Answered innocently._

_…_

_As it happened, little Francie did indeed have an early manifestation of the mage’s curse, a mildly debilitating form of ichthyophobia._

_The toddler was absolutely terrified of fish. Live fish, dead fish, real, or fake, she could not stand to look at them._

_She couldn’t be made to eat fish either, which was a fairly seriously issue given that their town had a strong fishing industry and the cheapest proteins they could buy were fish. Walking down the markets became an exercise in futility as the youngest Addison cried and fought the entire way._

_At the very least, it did absolutely nothing to help the Addison’s financial situation._

_And it certainly did not endear Francie to her father._

_~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~_

I’m not entirely certain where I am, only that I stand atop a platform with a spotlight shining down upon me. My hands are shackled to the ground, loose enough that they didn’t hurt when I moved them, but tight enough that I can’t slip my hands out, no matter how many fingers I dislocate. I tried to see if there was anything beyond the platform, but nothing. The light was too bright and it hid everything else from view.

I could hear the shuffling and murmurs of a crowd though.

“We have summoned thee on this the day for your execution.” boomed a voice that somehow came from everywhere and nowhere at once. It cut through the angry mutters of the hidden crowd.

I looked around, boggled at the situation. Pardon? Execution? For what?

“You have been charged with the murder of the king and his son.”

_“Y__ Wr___!” Stirred something from far away._

“There must be some mistake?!” I cried. “ I don’t know any royalty.”

“Do you deny that you are an opportunist?” The voice questioned.

“Wha-? No but what does tha-”

“Do you deny that you are a _murderer_?” it accused. “When you’ve blood on your hands?!”

I clenched my hands and froze at the wet, sticky sensation

I looked down and froze. My hands! When did they get covered in blood? Not just a small amount of blood either. It cascaded from my palms and fingers and dripped off the platform where it was swallowed by the eager crowd below.

Memories of blood and battle floated to mind. Blood and battle and… Fire?

Judging by the angry murmurs I was hearing, that was the wrong thing to do.

“Are you not the fallen human!” Insisted the voice.

_Ye-_ No!

What? Who? “I’m not!” I pleaded. “Please you have the wrong person! Let me go! It wasn’t me!”

_“Why ___ they d___ng this?” Whywhy_ **_why-?_ **

**“LIES”** Roared the crowd. “The liar LIES. Everything YOU touch gets destroyed.”

“SILENCE.” Boomed the voice. “The delusions of a traitor do not matter! The time of judgement has long since passed.”

A sense of dread settled in my gut. There was no way for me to talk my way out. Not when they wanted blood and it wouldn’t matter whose. My guilt was already decided. My sins will be punished.

Maybe not.

There’s no shame in executing a murderer after all. I’ve always stared death in the face, but never like this. I won’t go like this. I refuse.

“Your method of execution-” Boomed the voice.

I can’t die yet. My kid sister needs me. I can’t. I won’t. won’twon’t _won’tWON’T_ **_WON’T_ ** **WON’T**

”-Buttercups.”

As if on cue my shackles tightened and forced me to the floor. A figure materialized behind me and wrenched my jaw opened despite my efforts to resist.

The flowers were bitter and acrid. They burned as they were forced down my throat.

I thrashed and kicked and screamed with rage at the unfairness of it all. Me, dying because of someone else. But it was no use against the crowd swelling onto the platform. I felt the blows raining down upon me from fists, hooves, rocks and sticks.

_I will kill you all._

_“STO_ IT! PL__SE! I DON’T ___T THI-”_ Screamed a voice from far away, cutting in and out.

A scream tore its way from my throat. A sound the likes of which I have never heard before, filled with hatred and wrath and despair.

The taste of blood began to flood my mouth and I fell into the darkness.

Then something from far far away stirred.

**☼☜❄**

~O~O~O~

I jerked awake to find death inches from my face. Naturally, I did what any person would do in the face of the grim reaper. 

I punched the skeleton as hard as I could and bolted from the room. “DEATH SHAN’T TAKE ME TODAY BITCHES!” flew out of my mouth right before the ground disappeared.

I then tumbled down a flight of stairs before landing flat on my back. “Ow.” My back! Actually, Ow! My everything. I need to stop doing that. This hurts. 

“Sis!”

At this point I realized that I have no idea where the fuck I am and I should probably find out before something else happens. I struggled to sit up for a few moments, my back making its protests known the entire time. All attempts to push past the pain only left black spots in my vision.

I’m going to be feeling that for a while. So I gave up and flopped back down onto the ground.

It took a moment for my vision to clear. I found my sister crouched over me, eyes wide with concern. 

Oh thank god she’s alright. But.. Did she always have such big bags under her eyes?

“Hey Frisk.” I reached up and gently ruffled her hair. “I’m glad you’re alright.”

She responded by burrowing her head into my side and crying her eyes out.

Damn… Some big sister I am, making her cry like that. “Sorr-”

“I thought- I thought you were going to *Hic* die.” She sobbed. “You had blood c-coming out of your eyes and *hic* your nose.”

Shit. I did? That must’ve been freaky. I hate when that happens and it happens too often. My hand automatically went to my face.

“I wiped it off for you stupid.” Grumbled Frisk as she righted herself. “You’re sick aren’t you.”

“I could be better.” I admitted, not really wanting to think much on the details. I don’t want to leave my sister to fend for herself by getting sick. I can’t afford it can’t _ can’tCAN’T _ **CAN** \- “Say, where am I? The last thing I remember was getting tied up to a tree by the tea brained flower.” I squeezed out.

Frisk, not entirely oblivious to my internal screaming pulled away. Her eyes closing now that there wasn’t anything she needed them to see. “Oh! Um-”

“Human! You have awoken! You-” Screeched a voice from the top of the stairway. The grim reaper.

I jerked upright and fumbled for my yoyo because like hell I was going to go gently into the- 

Wait a minute. Why is the grim reaper in orange?

No, not grim reaper.

Wraith.

An opportunity for food and money.

I searched once more but no such luck.

**WHERE. IS. MY YOYO!**

I glanced over at my sister, who was shaking her head.

“That’s Papyrus. You’re in his house.” She chirped without a trace of anxiety. She tapped her the sleeve where she normally kept her sticks and I heard the faint grind of wood on wood. “He and his brother Sans are really nice.”

“Indeed we are large human. For you see ... ” Announced the orange wraith, jumping over the railing and landing before them. His arm thrust into the air like a shotgun as he spoke. “Your sister and I were in the process of beginning our epic final face off! The build up to our intense battle of wits! The stakes were high, the emotions overflowing as we stared each other down, both with the intent not to lose.”

“YOU ATTACKED MY SISTER?!” I screeched. I forced my legs under me and made to stand  and strangle the wraith. 

Then my brat of a sister tackled me back into the ground. “Char no! Nothing happened! Seriously.”

“Brat.” I grumped fondly. It wouldn’t have made any difference without an actual windpipe but I certainly would have felt better.

“Quite right young human!” Announced the wraith. “For before we could start the battle that would determine the fate of both monsters and humans, we heard a very large explosion!”

“And then I ran off to find you. Because no one wrecks things like you do sis. I even got a dragon to help!” She grumbled into into my stomach. “Well, Drake anyway.”

“Gee. Thanks.” I snorted. Then winced as she pressed a little too hard and gently pushed her off. 

“Naturally as a soon to be member of the royal guard I could not let her go into danger alone and valiantly followed her into the fray.” Boasted the skeleton.

“And then Snowdrake came and you fainted. I didn’t have any money for the inn, so Papyrus let us stay at his house.” Added Frisk. Then she stepped back and kicked me in the shins. “STOP OVERCLOCKING YOU DOOFUS! It’s bad for you!”

“And that is how you ended up in my home. Until you woke and greeted my face with your fist. There was not much power behind it but you have excellent form human! Is that a common greeting amongst your people? ”

“No? That’s a standard reaction to something strange ending up in your face. Pardon me a moment.” I said to the skeleton as I pulled my sister to me.  “Francie. He’s has no flesh.” I scowled and tried once more to arm myself, never taking my eyes off the skeleton by the stairway. 

“Duh.” She rolled her eyes. “They’re both skeletons..”

“Why wraiths, BONEWRAITHS of all things? They’re dangerous, I hunt their bounties for a living. Why not a cat boy or something? Or a lizard!” I flailed

This literally has bad news written all over it. And since when the fuck did wraiths have the brains for talking?! Or houses. I scratched my head and looked back at my sister. The skeleton was still rambling about something unimportant so nothing to worry about over there. I wonder what bone’s he’s made of. Maybe I can cook some of them?

My sister must’ve known me pretty well because she started speaking again.“-And they aren’t wraiths sis. Or bone fiends, or whatever the things are called. They’re monsters, so don’t eat them okay?” 

“I’m not in habit of eating things that can talk Frisk.” I snorted. Even if they make delicious edible looking bones. 

Yum. Bone soup sounds really good right about now.

“Well that’s good to know.” Drawled another voice. He was a rather heavy looking individual. Somehow. Perhaps he kept his money in his ribs? No, that was dumb. How, pray tell, would they stay in place?  “I was hoping my bro hadn’t brought a cannibal. We’ve already got one bone eater in the kitchen.”

I got the impression of a mobster. Strong, but no fucks given.

That- that’s not a good thing. At all. 

“WHAT! THAT ANNOYING DOG IS BACK?! He better not have eaten my special attack!” The tall skeleton clutched his skull as he ran into what I presume is the kitchen.

Frisk giggled and started following them.

“Frisk.”

“Hm?” She stopped and turned back to me. 

“You have a weapon? In case of emergencies?” Because you should always have a weapon. It’s life or death. Frisk is little, and the skeletons aren’t.

“Yup.” She nodded and pulled the stick out from inside her sleeve. She pulled another one out of the opposite sleeve. Probably using them as makeshift arm guards. Very clever, very good.

She’ll be able to hold her own while  I  take a breather. I gave her a thumbs up and started to pick myself off the floor. 

She gave me a concerned look before slowly trailing off into the kitchen.

I had just gotten to my feet when loud barks, laughter, and angry shouting soon rang from the kitchen, louder than anything I’ve heard before. The noise pounding into my head. God almighty, it was so bloody damn loud. 

“Kid? You alright?”

Shit. He heard me. Not Papyrus, the other one. The actually dangerous one. 

Shit shit shit shitshit _ shit _

“I...” Blood rushed through my ears so loudly it felt I was drowning. My heart pounding hard enough to burst out of my chest. I was falling falling falling, only nothing was moving?

_ Is this what a heart attack feels like? _

“I don’t-” I forced out. What’s happening to me? WHat’s GoiNG  **ON** ? Somebody HELP ME.  **HELP ME** . I-

I reached for the familiar comfort of my magic, deep deep inside me. Where it always was.  But I found nothing. Where is it? I need it! I need I have to- 

I- 

“Kid.” Sans stepped closer, one hand stretched out to grab me. “Calm down.”

“D-D **On’T** ” I jerked back and swiped at him. “Ple- I- FUCK!” -I found nothing. My hands grasped at empty air without my command. There was nothing there. Why isn’t there anything? This is bad I had to calm down calm calm calmcalm _ calmCALM _ **_CALM._ **

The world was spinning again. It had become familiar over the past year but that was bad. Very bad. My Magic. I Needed it. Where was- where did it  _ GO _ ?

I needed to calm down. But I  _ couldn’t _ calm down. 

“Large Human!” Shouted Papyrus from the distance. His voice cutting through my thoughts. “I apologize for leaving so suddenly but I had to stop this really annoying dog from devouring my attacks. I hope you did not ta- Er Small human? Did your sister eat something from Grillbys? She doesn’t look too well.”

His voice was like an ax. Slicing through the static in my mind, like a hot knife through butter, and leaving everything raw. Exposed. Bloody.

Still.

My stomach lurched for the umpteenth time this week.

Wait. Shit that’s not him. Wrong skeleton. The dangerous one was-

The events of the day finally caught up with me right at this point. The nonexistent contents of my stomach decided the floor was much more appealing and vacated the premises. Red spewed from my mouth and my nose. I’m mostly certain I stopped some of it with my hand, but I couldn’t be bothered to check. 

Silence reigned as I forced everything back down. My innards fought against me every step of the way, but eventually things settled down enough for me to try and clean myself off.

Control. Control. Always stay in control. It’s everything in this world.

The inside of my head felt like it was melting from my bloody stomach acid. Still, everything seemed to stay in place for the time being.

I wiped the dripping puke off my face. Messily I’m sure. 

Pale skin, bloody vomit on my face, stained and ratty clothing. I probably looked like a something from a horror movie nightmare.

Grasping the momentary silence . “... Is there a bathroom?” I squeaked.

The skeletons shared a look with my sister. The smaller one Sans answered. “Yeah. Up the stairs. Turn right. It’s the door on the end.”

“Thanks.” I croaked. I glanced down at the mess. “S’rry ‘bout your slippers.”

“Eh. Fogetaboudit. That’s  _ barf- _ or the course when you’re sick.” Shrugged the skeleton as he kicked off the fouled slippers. “Just gotta make sure I don’t  _ slip up  _ or anything while I clean up the puke.”

Excuse me? I- wha-?

I swayed on my feet, struggling to follow the abrupt change in the conversation flow.

Francie started giggling. It was forced and hysterical. 

Oh great. Now she’s going to start punning over and over like  a used car salesman. I hope. That would be normal and normal sounds great right about now.

“You mean when  _ I  _ clean up the puke.” Retorted Papyrus. “I’ve never seen you clean anything.”

“Aw bro the lack of faith hurts. I actually was gunna do it, but since you’re offering I don’t see why I should turn ya down. I’m gonna go call  _ emetic _ .”

ARE YOU SERIOUS. ANOTHER ONE OF THOSE PEOPLE?!

“AUGH!” Groaned the taller skeleton.

Nope. I don’t have the energy for that right now. I can’t. I don’t. No. 

I ground my knuckles into my temples and slowly made my way to the bathroom. 

…

A gaunt, bone thin figure stared back at me from the mirror. It was like a demented clown from a cheap horror show. With the blood smeared on my face, tangled clay colored hair and patch work clothes I could get good a job at the devil’s circus.

I looked bloody awful.

No pun intended.  Ugh. Those stupid boneheads must’ve gotten to me.

Still, the silence of the bathroom was a welcome reprieve from the noise between my ears. 

There’s no helping the cold or the exhaustion that’s seeped into my bones. It’s a different sort of cold, the kind that goes so deep it burns. Even in the coldest of winters, you can never be this cold. It’s oddly familiar somehow and I wondered if I should be worried. Even with the hot water running over my hands the warmth escapes me. 

The pain however, does not. Story of my life right there. I cupped the water in my hands, like the heat would give me the energy I so desperately needed. 

Hot water is terrible for taking off stains off clothes. But it feels so, so good to get the blood and grime off of my face. And the rest of me too. I’d even take the chance to wash our clothes if it didn’t leave us both naked in a house full of skeletons. 

Not to mention being forced to stare at my own ribs in the reflection. 

And my scars.

“It’s me.” I murmured softly as I reached out to touch the reflection. It had been so long since I saw myself in a mirror. I had almost forgotten what I was. I had forgotten what I looked like.

Me and everything I’ve been through.

My skin was a battle field of scars. From bullet wounds from rival bounty hunters, to claw marks from feral wraiths to knife cuts of vengeful mobsters, and that one burn. Each one of them, a mark of failure, of stupidity on my part. Each time I swore I would not receive another and each time I would fail. The only ones that didn’t bother me were the rope burns on my hands and wrists that came from using my beloved yoyo. And also the one on my hip, that was a good scar. I was proud of it. I lead a stampede and met my closest friend that day. That was a good day.

God I missed Vermeer. I hope he’s alright. I really hope I’ll see him again.

Maybe Francie and I could join a circus, we’d have food and shelter covered and I’m sure we could be performers.

Hey. Now that I think about it, I’d make a  _ GREAT _ addition to the freak show. I had just about every kind of scar on me. None of them on my face thankfully, that’d be hard to hide.

Sometimes, on cold winter nights they would ache.

Francie always got so upset when ever she saw them. I never could keep them a secret from her. The worst thing in the world, was watching her face crumple each time I got a new one.

Still, I need to keep it together. I can’t fall apart now. 

_ The cracks are growing. Time is running out. _

My sister needs me. I can’t leave her like this. Alone with the sharks.

_ She doesn’t belong in the criminal underworld. _

There was still so much I have to teach her.

_ Lying. Cheating. Stealing. _

It’s nothing serious. It’ll go away.

_ Dead girl walking. _

I’m fine. I won’t stay down from something stupid like a stomach ache.

_ Rotting from the inside. Just like mama. _

I’ll be fine. It’s just the weather screwing with my magic.

_ Leaking out of your mind like everything good in life. _

I have to be. Somebody has to do it. There’s no one else.

_ No help is coming. You’re on your own. _

I feel fantastic.

_ I’m falling apart. _

I’m good.

_ I’m dying. _

I’m okay.

_ I’m not. _

I’m okay.

_ Somebody save me. _

I-

-Slammed my forehead into the sink. No sense in complaining. No help is coming. I’m on my own.

Chin up. Shoulders back. Smile.

…

Eventually I put together some semblance of composure before I stepped back out of the bathroom. It felt like I had spent forever in there but it was probably only a few minutes. At least, I hope it was a few minutes. There weren’t any clocks for me to keep track. The commotion downstairs hadn’t subsided at all, nothing worth mentioning then. 

The shorter skeleton was just outside the door. 

“Mr. Bones” I nodded, not quite remembering his name.

I made a beeline for the only other open door. Given that I fell down the stairs right after busting out bed, I’m pretty sure that was the one where my stuff was kept.

With my head in a less panicky state and no nightmares to occupy me, I could actually slow down and take in the details of the bedroom. 

I must say. It looks like the bedroom of a manchild. The book shelves contained an odd juxtaposition of engineering, and cardboard baby books. The baby books somehow managed to be new, well worn, and well read too, which was rather peculiar. Most people kept their children’s books for their art work, or in a few rare cases, it was a limited edition signed by the author. The bed was the shape of a bloody race car and if that wasn’t childish I’d eat my left shoe. 

The computer had a really amateurish looking social web page displayed on it. A quick skim gave me nothing useful. 

I could ignore the action figures on the dresser. I had an old friend by the name of Vermeer who collected action figures and video games. Frisk and I had to leave in such a hurry… I hope he’s doing well. I miss him.

The strangest thing in the room was probably the box of bones by the entrance.  Why would a skeletal monster wraith need bones? Are they pieces of themselves that he puts away when he doesn’t need them? Does he eat them like animals do? 

I reached in and pulled on out to inspect it. It was the length of my thigh, with a giant knob on one end and two smaller ones on the other. A bear femur maybe. No, its too smooth. Unnaturally smooth, in fact. 

Do other monsters have bones? Where did they get them?

A chill crawled down my spine as I thought of the implications. 

I don’t know whose bedroom this is, and I don’t really care to find out.

None of my stuff is here. I’m left without any yoyos, money, food, water or… My medication. Worse yet, Aswyl is missing and  I have no intention of losing the last thing I have from my childhood, even if its a ratty old bunnyback. My sister has always had good judgement, but there are somethings even she can’t see. 

The wr- skeletons might not attack us, but judging by those bones, I have no doubt they would sell us off to those that would. I refuse to be here when that happened. I especially refuse to be unarmed when it happened. With a yoyo I could open up a path or crack a few skulls.

We can’t go anywhere without our stuff though. Not for long anyway. It was freezing outside and the rest of the underground can’t be much better. At the very least we’d need my ‘first aid’ kit.

By which I meant my bundle of stolen bandages, mouthwash, dental floss, and aspirin.

I felt my anxiety building once again, bubbling and rising from deep within-

-wait no. It was only bile. Again.

Blargh... I need to get out of here.

I need to-

I need…

_ N__ Like this! _

What?

~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~

_ You remember one time, when both you and your sister fell together. The first time actually. _

_ In a way it was the hardest run of your life. It forced you to realize several things, to think about them and what it meant. It forced you grow up and stop being a useless dead weight on your sister _

_ And it hurt, growing up, it hurt so much. You would never ever be the same. _

_ You think you understand your sister better now and you wondered how she could manage it while caring for you. _

_ Your enemies were the dark feelings, scary thoughts, bad memories. They were the things you’d rather forget, ignore, and set aside for later. They were the ironclad rules you had made for yourself and for others. The small tricks that worked out for you so far and kept you out of trouble on the surface. Until you fell. _

_ Your sister on the other hand was a much more confrontational person. She’d much rather point and laugh at the things that scare her. Or if she couldn’t do that, fight it tooth and nail. _

_ You weren’t your sister, who always faced such things head on. You preferred to slow down and look at everything. You liked to step out of fights and fade into the background. You liked to look on the bright side of things. You liked to go with the flow and get along with everybody like water in soup.  _

_ Big sis, on the other hand focused on all the things that can’t change, the absolute case scenarios, and bent the world to her will.  To end the threats as quickly and cleanly as possible. Chaos was her element and she relished in the unknown. She took charge and lit up the night like a star or a flame. _

_ You liked knowing that things will probably get better. _

_ She liked knowing that things probably won’t get worse. _

_ That was probably the biggest and most important difference between the two of you.  _

_ And that’s probably why being chased up the mountain, from everything you knew hurt so much. Mirwen city was where you had spent most of your life. _

_ How much worse was it for your sister who had to flee from your hometown because of your father’s debts? You barely had any memory of that time but you knew she carried you that first time because you were too little to run to keep up. _

 

_ Toriel had been so surprised to see her and so confused. “Oh Ka-Children. I can’t imagine what you have been through.“  _

_ Char eyed her with suspicion and clung to you while Toriel fussed. You didn’t know if it was to reassure you or herself, but you clung back just as hard. You weren’t scared of Toriel hurting you though. You knew that she wouldn’t, but you had never seen her this unsettled either. She looked like she’d just seen a ghost. She was constantly turning away and muttering to herself, even as she led you through the ruins. _

_ Toriel even tripped a few times, like… like papa did the few times you remembered him coming home. She didn’t swear though, she was too ladylike for that. Or throw things at you. _

_ You remembered squeezing your sister’s hand and you remembered her squeezing right back. _

_ Toriel didn’t even make you wait in the ruins while she went grocery shopping. She actually brought you all the way to HOME.  _

_ The ruins weren’t dangerous, not to you. It only had small monsters. So when Char’s terrible health inevitably got the better of her and Toriel forced her to bed to rest. You slipped out to explore.  _

_ Not in present time, because you had already found all the places you could go. But the in past. _

_ Because if you are the only humans to have passed through the ruins you would eat your holey old shoes. _

_ So you wandered. Alone. Looking for memories, clues. _

_ Too much time had passed for you to see clearly, or maybe it was something else, the images were fuzzy and distorted and hard to make out. But you saw some bits about the most recent visitor. _

_ You found the ribbon and the toy knife where they always sat and you held them to see what their owner was like. _

_ The kid who owned these… What was she like? _

_.... _

_ A girl named… Oh, you can’t really pick it out but she was young. Very young it seems. She fell after wandering away from someone. She liked to find bugs and scare people by jumping out of piles of leaves. Curious too like most little kids. She liked to wander. _

_ You even saw when she died when you went to the spot where her toy knife was. _

_ The girl was curious about the balcony but she was too little to see. First she tried calling for help. But nobody came. _

_ She tried jumping onto the ledge but her legs were too short and she fell again. _

_ Then she put down the knife, took a few steps back, and leapt at the wall. “Swow, steady….Pouwnce!” _

_ Success! Oh, but she was only half on her platform. She reached out with her little hands, grabbed the opposite edge, and wriggled her way to her feet. Slow and steady. _

_ It was hard and the ledge was thin! But look at the view! Look! So cool! There were so many buildings and she was so high up! _

_ “Wook! Wook!” She cried and bounced in excitement! But nobody heard.  _

_ “Human?” Cried a voice. “How did you get up there?.... You should get off there… but only if you want to… Sorry.” _

_ “I cwimbed up by myself!” She crowed then looked around for the voice. “Swow and steady! The wuins are coow!” _

_ “See?” Then she did a little twirl, on one foot. Then looked around puzzled. “Who’s talkin’?” _

_ “Oh… it’s me…” Replied a voice. And then it happened. “I’m Napstablook...” _

_ A ghost appeared right in front of the girl. _

_ The young child screamed in alarm and stumbled backwards… off the ledge.  _

_ …. _

_ You jerk out of your visions and throw the toy aside as hard as you could and cried.  _

_ Quietly of course, so that no one heard you.  _

_ You’ve seen many things with your creepy seer eyes. Lots of gross things, scary things, confusing things. Sad things too, but nothing as sad as that little girl falling right after doing something cool. _

_ And Napstablook. You wondered if that was why the ghost always seemed to anxious. Maybe that was why he always floated around rather than popping up anywhere. Or why he tended to fade in and out. _

_ Monsters…. They really didn’t know anything about humans did they? Nothing beyond the concept.  _

_ You take a moment to calm yourself. And maybe wipe away your snot. The girl is dead and there’s nothing you can do about it even if you knew what to do. You’re going to tell your sister what you saw, maybe she would have some ideas. _

_ You decide not to touch the knife again. _

_ The RUINS seemed much more somber on your stroll back after what you’ve seen so you close your eyes and shut it out. You’ll walk into walls occasionally but you’ll can manage.  _

_ Toriel, after a lot of hand wringing, let you both leave unmolested. She even made a few notions to come with you but stayed behind for the flowers. _

_ That first epiphany, it was like bursting the floodgates.  _

_ You saw the orange soul, loud and brash and proud as he charged through the forest. Built like a bear, he plowed down everything in his path. _

_ … _

_ “Kid. I don’t care much for fighting now why don’ cha sit down and stop attackin’ the locals. They aren’t hurting-” _

_ “Screw off asshole! I’m going home and you can’t stop me!” Snarls the boy. He is covered in scars and bruises. He’s got a black left eye, dark like a panda. _

_ “I’m warning you-” _

_ “I’m gonna kill the bastards that threw me down here and anyone who gets in my way.” And with that he launched himself at Sans. _

_ “Welp. I guess it can’t be helped.” Shrugged the skeleton. He steps to the side and watches the boy pass with a glowing left eye. Bones started forming around the both of them. “I can’t have you causing any more trouble. Especially not with my bro getting into the human hunting business.” _

_ “Wha-” _

_ Then the bones forced themselves through his ribcage, his skull, and his throat with a sickening crunch. _

_ … _

_ And you saw Sans killing him. Not because the boy had killed anyone. Not because he beat people up, which wasn’t a big deal because Undyne did that all the time. But because he would kill in the future. _

_ It frightened you at the time, to think that such an easy going person could kill with such certainty. But then, it wasn’t too different from what your sister did to the more unscrupulous hunters. She never killed anyone except that time when you were both taken. She wasn’t a filthy murderer, not like you were, and not like Sans is. _

_ But sometimes you wondered if that was a good thing. _

_ Those who tried to steal her bounties, were often met with sticks and stones and shattered leg bones.  Scarlet, the mage doctor could heal nearly anything, but you actually had to get to her first and you can’t do that with broken legs. You can’t fight wraiths with broken legs either, or run from dangerous animals. Or hunt for food... _

_ Maybe your sister wasn’t what you thought after all because the notion of waiting for death to come was scarier than anything you’ve encountered.  _

_ Charlie Rae… When did she become so… ruthless? When did she become like the mobsters you hid from? When did she become a bad person? A villain? A hypocrite? _

_ But then, was she really? Char was still your big sister. She was still nice to you and she was still there for you when you came home after a school scuffle. She still played with you and trained with you, even when she was tired from work, or sick. She sang to you on cold rainy days, even if she didn’t remember the lyrics. _

_ So… maybe she wasn’t. It was all confusing. Why was it suddenly so hard to know what was right and wrong? She said once that killing was wrong, unless you had to but then why-? _

_ It would’ve been easier to abandon you at an orphanage. She could’ve just let Papa sell you to the mobsters when you were younger to pay the bills. Or she could’ve sold you off herself and stayed in school. You knew she missed it. Or joined a mob. She wouldn’t have to do those terrible things like crippling people or touching private parts if she did. _

_ Char loved you but why did she stay? Love wasn’t enough to hold a family together. Papa loved you too, and he still left the two of you in face of his grief. Well, maybe he didn’t love you, but he did love Big sis and she loved him back. She could have left. _

_ But she didn’t. She stayed and fought tooth and nail for you and you didn’t know what to make of that. Even when enemies, hunger, cold, rain, despair, exhaustion and all the other invisible things closed in on all sides, she stayed with you.  _

_ Why? _

_ Charlie was still Charlie . She was you sister and she loved you and you loved her too. Warts and all. _

_ And that meant, maybe Sans was still Sans.  _

_ Once upon a time he fought something unseen. Once upon a time, he gave up and lost. _

_ Sans wasn’t crazy, so there had to be more to the skeleton than just the creepy smile and murdery threats. _

_ Maybe you could find out and help. _

_ Maybe just maybe you could find it in yourself to even become friends. _

_ And most importantly, maybe you could find some answers. _

~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~

Sans and Papyrus’ house always felt a bit like an old playground at night to you.

Lots and lots of happy memories floated through your mind's eye joy, laughter, and contentment. All of them superimposed onto the mostly quiet house. Sans taking Papyrus back and forth from school, helping him with homework. You saw Papyrus selling his own drawings to buy Sans a birthday present. Papyrus chattering in excitement about getting training from . .. ugh Undyne. Sans’s face when he first sees his brother cooking. You also saw his completely different expression of dismay when he had to eat it. Papyrus making his battle body.

It was a near endless onslaught of moments in time with the skeleton brothers. Both of them looking like polished copper pennies in their prime.

And someone else? You shook your head. 

Maybe that was just a little too far back.

But at the same time you also saw stress, sadness, and the slow decline of wear and tear. Things that seem out of place until suddenly, it isn’t.

Things like Sans, burned out and slamming his fist into a wall in frustration. Sans talking to people that aren’t (?) there. Things like Sans not talking or moving no matter how hard Papyrus tries. Sans roaring into the void. Things breaking down little by little. Papyrus acquiring increasingly outlandish habits and mannerisms to try and cheer his brother up with decreasing amounts of success.

Sans switching the lab coat and pants for shorts and a hoodie and Papyrus refusing to change out of his costume when it makes Sans laugh. The beginnings of San’s questionable ketchup addiction.

You stop.

Too close too close. Much too close to home.

You closed your eyes again to shut it out.

You suspect that Sans would kill you if he knew you could do this. You could reload, but that would put your sister at risk. Well, more specifically, it would put Papyrus at risk because she would certainly kill him if she thought he was hurting you. Which would probably set off Sans because your sister is way waaaay more dangerous than you are. And also way more like him.

Her powers are at least.

Your powers are a lot less obvious than hers. A lot more passive. That said people generally don’t like seers. Your unofficial big bro Vermeer once explained that it was like having someone watch you pee. Which is gross and why would anyone do that anyway? 

Personally, you thought it was just the eyes.

Your sister thought they were cool and useful. Since you’ve got away with stealing an outfit more than once by pretending to be a mannequin, you’re inclined to agree.

The kids at school didn’t though. They said that Char was stupid and that your eyes belonged on a brainwashed zombie. It hurt and you punched them for that. Then you mauled them with the shrieking fury of a six year old for your sister’s insult. You wonder if they have any scars from your teeth back then. You were missing some of your front teeth and your fangs were very sharp. You also knew you tasted blood a few times. You regret getting your sister in trouble for that. But you don’t regret biting them.

The image of your sister being insulted for protecting you still fills you with unbridled rage. But now wasn’t the time to think of that. 

You pressed your hands into your eyeballs as if to scrub the image from your thoughts.

The skeleton brothers haven’t done anything like that. Ever. Not even in the… worst runs.

“Human! Are you going to sleep on your feet!?” Boomed a voice from behind you.  “My brother always does that. Even though he takes eight hour naps at night.”

“EEK!” You jump and dive under the table. It takes you a moment but there’s only one person in Snowdin that shouts inside. “Papyrus! D-Don’t scare me like that!”

“I sincerely apologize for startling you. I just thought I’d tell you that while the great and powerful Papyrus disapproves of napping in the middle of the day you should lie down if you must. You and your sister do not appear to be in the greatest of health which means you should really eat this spaghetti.” The skeleton held out a plate of suspicious smelling noodles in your direction.

“I KNOW THAT-” you snap at him not moving from under the table or accepting the plate. If you tried hard enough, you could pretend you were inside Halvern and that you could visit Vermeer or take a hot shower. “I-I already know that. I’m not tired or sick. Sis is and she needs medicine. Really. I just… like to keep my eyes closed. It makes me look cool when I can walk without opening them.” You run your fingers through your hair and distract yourself untangling the knots.

Papyrus hummed but said nothing. 

You cracked open an eye and peeked out from under the table to see what caused this unusual response.

You followed his gaze to Sans who had been waiting for your sister to leave the bathroom so he could use it.

The shorter skeleton was smiling even less than he usual. 

Creepy. At least compared to how you usually saw him.

Your sister stepped out of the bathroom moments later with her bangs suspiciously rearranged. She said something to Sans and then bolted for Papyrus’s room. 

She then dashed out moments later and nearly fell down the stairs again. She caught herself halfway though, so that’s good at least. She took a long look at Papyrus, and then at yourself. “Oh. Frisk. Hi. Why are you under the table? Is the wra-skeleton bothering you?”

“Uh. Sis? Maybe you should go back to bed?” You suggested. “You don’t look too good.” Then remembering how aggressive she got regarding your safety, hastily tacked on. “No. He’s not bothering me. I’m doing a dog impression.”

“And what an excellent dog impression it is! The small human is much less annoying than the white dog! She doesn’t eat my special attack for one.”

“...O-kay then.” Chara raised an eyebrow. She muttered something that sounded suspiciously like ‘I guess he’s the manchild’ under her breath. Then she got a cheeky look on her face. “Aw sis. You didn’t tell him about bone soup?”

“No Charlie Rae.” You point at her with a very serious expression. “Do not.” You climbed out from under the table. “Your not supposed to scare people like that. Even if it’s funny.”

“Myeh. Fine.  If you say so.” She responds. You are fairly certain she just stuck her tongue out at you. She always does that when she pokes at things. You feel the floorboards shift as Char rocks back on her heels. “I can’t find Aswyl. Have you seen him?”

“No. He’s probably back in the forest.”  You shake your head. Then your eyes snap open as you remember something. “But I saw our stuff scattered everywhere. I’ll go get your medicine.”

You start running to the door when you feel something tugging on the collar of your shirt. You find yourself being magically lifted off the ground and dumped on the couch. “Nu- uh. No way. It’s bloody freezing out there and I’ve got at least forty pounds on you. I’ll stay warm a lot longer.”

“But you’re sick.” You protest and you spill off the couch. “AND DAMMIT STOP USING YOUR MAGIC!”

“Whoops. Force of habit.” She shrugged. Her expression morphs in into a mixture of disdain and manic suspicion with her eyes nearly fluorescent with magic and hair slowly rising behind her. “Anyway I do NOT trust that flower. That music player is expensive.”

Oh you hate when she does this. You hate when she ignores her health for  _ STUPID THINGS _ . “SIS, YOU DIDN’T EVEN PAY FOR IT.” You shout. Then, knowing the futility of actually stopping Chara without tackling her again you grind your knuckles into your temples. “At least eat something first. Magic food helps with stuff like bloody vomiting.”

Papyrus who had been watching the two of you with wide eye sockets jumped into the conversation. “Indeed Large human! You are not well, which means you are in need of some spaghetti. Fortunately we have plenty in the food museum.”

“The what?”

“You mean the fridge?” You sighed.

“Yes. That is what I said.” He then shoved he same plate of suspicious smelling noodles in Char’s face along with a fork. “Here. Have some. I just made it.”

Your sister eyed the offering warily. She took a sniff, decided it wasn’t poisoned or rotting, and mechanically began to eat it. 

“Hey. Qfick quef’tion.” Began Chara, then paused to swallow. “Is this supposed to taste like lemon pulp with worms? Because I swear this is sour enough to make a goose pucker.” The teen then resumed ingesting the spaghetti, slowly and mechanically, but with great purpose.

“Sis!” If the spaghetti tasted that bad why was she still eating it? Plus you’ve eaten worms before and his pasta did not taste like them. Maybe she meant the way the noodles felt? “Save some for later at least.”

“Oh no worries. We have plenty and you can always come back to have some.” Assured Papyrus, who looked delighted that someone who wasn’t obligated to eat his food was eating it. “I’ve never heard that about my cooking before, could it be that a human’s sense of taste is different from a monster’s? How fascinating!”

“Maybe?” Blinked Char. Once her plate was empty she placed it on the steps. “Aaanyways. I gotta go-grab-Aswyl-and-my-yoyo-before-Flowey destroys-him-I’ll-be-back-later! Bye!” And then she sped out before the skeleton could offer her another plate.

You dash out after her but by the time you stuck your head out, she was already at the bridge. Snowdrake waved until he caught your eye and gave a thumbs up as he trotted after your stupid sister.

You pulled yourself back in and glanced curiously at Papyrus.

Papyrus glanced around for Sans. Upon not seeing his brother anywhere he leaned down and whispered. “You know… Your sister reminds me of my brother when we were younger.” He glanced around once more and sighed wistfully. “He used to have more energy and actually did things like work, and laundry. Can you believe that?” 

“Really?” You stroked your chin and tried to imagine an energetic Sans but you couldn’t. He was more animated in your visions, still not what you would call energetic. The closest you managed was Sans with your sister’s clothes and hair and that was  _ weird. _ Char used to be a pretty upbeat person, even if her jokes were kind of scary. Then again, you could totally see both of them threaten someone and then say it was a joke.

You  _ did _ see it actually. But you prefer not to think about it.

“Indeed. He used to have more than one hp too and now... I wish he would take care of himself more often, but he only ever eats at Grillbys. At least I don’t have to worry about him getting … hurt. He’s too lazy to fight anyone.”

“Wow.” Your eyes widened. You’ve never had this sort of conversation down here before. And definitely not with Papyrus of all people. But you supposed it made sense. He  _ lived  _ with Sans. He’d have to have actual brain damage to not pick up on anything. “I wish I could say the same for my sister. The lazy part, not the other thing. Sis just gets all over protective and stuff. She keeps trying to say things are better than they really are even though I’m not blind and I know she’d burn down the country along with herself, if it kept me safe.” You wheezed. You take a moment to collect yourself before continuing. “But I don’t let her… She forgets that I’m strong too. She was the one who raised me. So how can I be weak?”

“Human, it looks like out big siblings are very much alike. Sans does the same thing and no matter what I say I can’t make him stop!” He threw his arms into the air as if prasing some non existent god. “Finally, someone who can understand the troubles I go through for my lazy brother.” 

You looked around the house once more as the skeleton kept rambling about his brother. This time you look at the sturdy walls, the curtains that weren’t blowing in the wind, the warm fluffy rug. You hear water running from upstairs.

This cozy house fills you with… envy. That’s the word right? Or was it jealousy?

Did it matter?

You find yourself spilling your feelings to the skeleton without realizing it.

“I’m a little jealous. You have a house and it’s actually warm. Your sink  _ actually _ works. Your clothes  _ actually _ fit you and you don’t have to wonder if you’ll wake up to a bloodbath outside. Everybody likes you and even though things aren’t bad they can always get better!” You admit. You sink into the ground and press your back against the couch. “Chara and I… Winters are cold, I don’t like them. Our house in a giant shed sized box without out a lid. The bed isn’t always a bed. Sometimes it’s a pile of grass, and rocks are our pillows. Pigeons, dandelions and garbage from a restaurants are standard food until Sis gets a bounty. People only like us when we’re making them money and they’ll beat us for our mistakes. Every day is the same and there’s no hope for us!” 

By the end of your spiel you are screaming and the room is blurry. You wipe the tears away in a hurry because people don’t like that sort of thing. But they keep coming. “It’s not- She’s- Charlie’s lying...”

There is an awkward moment of silence and you wonder if you spoke too much. And then you feel a set of boney arms wrap around you.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> “FRISK”
> 
> LV: 1
> 
> HP 20/20
> 
> AT 0 (7) EXP: 0
> 
> DF 0 (10) NEXT: 10
> 
> WEAPON: STICK- ITS BARK IS WORSE THAN ITS BITE
> 
> ARMOR: BANDAGE- IT’S ALREADY BEEN USED SEVERAL TIMES.
> 
> GOLD: 0
> 
> “CHARA”
> 
> LV: 3
> 
> HP 60/60
> 
> AT 6 (3) EXP: 45
> 
> DF 0 (10) NEXT: 10
> 
> WEAPON: NONE
> 
> ARMOR: NONE
> 
> STATUS: BLEED(Moderate)- HP DRAINS EVERY FEW STEPS.
> 
> GOLD: 0


End file.
